Ep 225: Libras Are Obsessed with Romance
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SARAH: Hey what's up hello, welcome to Sounds Fake but Okay, a podcast where an aroace girl, I'm Sarah that's me
KAYLA: And a bi demisexual girl, that's me Kayla
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don't understand.
KAYLA: On today's episode: libras
SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds fake, but okay
(theme music plays)
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod!
KAYLA: For you, it's been a week. For us –
SARAH: It's been 24 hours
KAYLA: Almost exactly 24 hours.
SARAH: I was about to say I don't know if we have any housekeeping because we are podcasting the day after we did last week's episode
KAYLA: Who's to say? Hopefully not.
SARAH: Who's to say what's going to happen in the next week and a half? So this is going to be one of those classic timeless episodes. It's not that far in advance, but still. So this week's topic actually came up at a super secret special time. Remember when we were on break and we were like "we're really busy still doing podcast things"? That might be because for our book, we may or may not be having bonus super secret podcast episode for each chapter of the book.
KAYLA: Maybe.
SARAH: Maybe.
KAYLA: Hypothetically.
SARAH: Hypothetically. Which, this is our first time talking about it, so if you're here, you're first in line. There's no limit, it's not like it caps at 20 people. Anyway. But this was actually something we thought of while we were recording that.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: So I wrote it down and I was like "this is a good podcast episode idea." So if you listen to our book super secret special book episodes, you will hear me go "Oh, that's a good idea"
KAYLA: True. I guess updates on the book because I feel like we haven't talked about it in a while.
SARAH: Mm.
KAYLA: It is coming out February of 2023
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: It is in the works. It is written, and now it is in the editing stages.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And –
SARAH: If you saw a cover, no you didn't.
KAYLA: Yeah. Things are happening.
SARAH: We have not seen the final cover yet.
KAYLA: No. But there are a lot of other ace books. It's not available for pre-order yet because we're still finalizing things, but Eris Young's book, Cody Ace Dad's book, and Sherronda J. Brown's book are all up for pre-order currently.
SARAH: I'm looking at Sherronda J Brown's book right now.
KAYLA: We got an early edition!
SARAH: I feel so special. I was really confused though because I didn't recognize the name and I forgot that it was coming so I was like "who the fuck sent me mail?"
KAYLA: Surprise mail! So yeah, we'll be talking about all those books at later times when they get closer.
SARAH: Mm.
KAYLA: So yeah. This has been a book update.
SARAH: Book update. Great. Well. Kayla, what are we talking about this week?
KAYLA: This week, we are revisiting the topic of astrology. We did an episode on astrology years ago now, where I believe we read our full birth charts.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And talked about the accuracy. And today we're specifically talking about libras, which is what Sarah is.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Because Sarah has some feelings about inaccuracies she feels with her sign
SARAH: I do.
KAYLA: So yeah.
SARAH: Yeah. So just to be crystal clear about the context here, I'm an aromantic asexual and I am a libra. I was born in October. That makes me a libra. I'm not superstitious, but I'm a little stitious. So like I feel like astrology is the sort of thing that if it matched up I might put some stock in it. It's like Myers-Briggs. I know it's not real but also I still care about it.
KAYLA: I have strong feelings about Myers-Briggs. I'm sure we've talked about this before.
SARAH: We have.
KAYLA: I believe in astrology 100% more than I believe in the Myers-Briggs.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So that should tell you something. A lot of things.
SARAH: I find myself completely unable to put any stock in astrology, not that I would put a lot of stock. I think I've established before that the only thing I put any stock into at all is tarot reading because you are actively applying it to your life, it's not being like "you're going to die next week" but I have a serious problem with my astrological sign, which is that libras are supposed to be
(05:00)
SARAH: – romance obsessed. And as I have established, I'm an aro.
KAYLA: And not just an aro, like a romance averse aro.
SARAH: Yeah, like a not interested in participating aro. And so whenever I see my – what's it called?
KAYLA: Sign?
SARAH: No, the thing where it tells you what's going to happen.
KAYLA: Horoscope?
SARAH: Horoscope. Whenever I see my horoscope, like 75% of the time it has to do with romantic love and I'm like "fuck that shit that doesn't apply to me"
KAYLA: Should we read your horoscope for today?
SARAH: Maybe. We'll get to this, but my roommate is an astrology expert, and I did consult her for this episode. But there is an astrology instagram that every week she sends me what it says for libras
KAYLA: Wait, I want to know
SARAH: Because they're funny. Hold on, let me find...
KAYLA: I will say, I enjoy things like astrology, crystals, tarot, stuff like that.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: I find it entertaining. I find it fun to believe in. Horoscope I struggle with.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Because you go to any website, they all say something different.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I put way more stock in just astrological signs in general than just a prescriptive horoscope, you know?
SARAH: Yeah. So this is an Instagram, it's @horror.scoops. For context, none of the names of the signs are spelled correctly.
KAYLA: Oh this is very good.
SARAH: Yeah, so libra is Lehbrah. Pisces is Piscerrs. Scorpio is Slurpeeo. And you, my friend, are a torbus.
KAYLA: I'm reading the most recent torbus.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And wowee!
SARAH: Go ahead and read it.
KAYLA: Torbus, with a poorly drawn bull. If you were a mermaid, you wouldn't need a scarecrow, but you could still have one, and you could still name her Barbara.
SARAH: Yep. Mine this week, it didn't speak to me as much. Mine this week is Lehbrah: you're like a panther at a vape shop. Yes you're a wild and uncontrollable apex predator, but you're actively courting your chill side, trying to be easy-breezy baby.
KAYLA: I would not say that is accurate to you.
SARAH: Yeah, it didn't really speak to me as much this week, but there was one. (laughter) Sorry, this is one that my roommate did not send me. It's from 2 weeks ago, and Libra is just "to the masturbatorium!"
KAYLA: Oh my god
(laughter)
SARAH: I can see why she didn't send that to me.
KAYLA: I'm trying to find just kind of like a basic explanation
SARAH: Oh, aries is arbys
KAYLA: Oh, that's very good. I'm trying to find just a basic description of libra, so we can... I don't want a daily horoscope!
SARAH: Okay, I'm trying to find the first one that she send me.
KAYLA: (laughing) Your anatomy is the kidneys. I didn't know signs came with anatomy, but you're the kidney.
SARAH: Oh my. My horoscope from a couple weeks ago was "duct tape tennis rackets to your shoulder blades and run through a baby GAP until you, or the manager, feel you've done enough damage"
KAYLA: So I think Libra's main thing is like balance. It's the little picture of the little weights.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: We don't have to go through this whole thing, that's not what we're here for.
SARAH: No. Do not make direct eye contact with a squirrel or it will become angry and attempt to gnaw off your ankles.
KAYLA: Oh.
SARAH: These are the kind of horoscopes I like. "You're feeling fun and flirty, so this is the perfect week to fake a Swedish accent."
KAYLA: Okay, so here's where I think the romance thing comes from.
SARAH: (whispering) I'm closing this now.
KAYLA: Each – I'm pretty sure each astrological sign has a specific planet that goes with it?
SARAH: Am I Venus?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Mm.
KAYLA: Which is, you know, the love god or whatever.
SARAH: Well yeah, because Venus is Aphrodite.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: (singing) I'm your Venus. I'm your fire. I'm a commercial for razors.
KAYLA: So – ooh, interesting. Your libra friend – now it's talking about libras in friendships, your libra friend may leave you frustrated. Yeah.
SARAH: Is that it?
KAYLA: She does. Well there was more, but that's good. Yes. Typically each sign comes with its stereotypes, and libras are usually very sexual and romantic
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SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Which is not very relatable to Sarah.
SARAH: No. It's extremely allonormative, and it doesn't speak to me. Now I have talked to my roommate about my – she has a birthday book and we looked at my birthday and it didn't really track, but then she was like "sometimes the day before or after can be better" and I was like "well, I was born at 2 in the morning, let's look at the day before" and the day before did match.
KAYLA: Oh, there you go.
SARAH: Anyway, I was always like "I don't get the balance thing. I'm horrible at making decisions" and then my roommate was like "yes, that's why you're bad at making decisions" and I was like "hmm"
KAYLA: Ohh. So here's, I feel like this is what I was referencing in the bonus episode where this topic is brought up.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And why I thought this would be interesting to talk about, is a different interpretation of the way libras are often interpreted, which is super romance and sex obsessed, because obviously, as we know, sex sells. So that's what all the L magazine, zodiac things are going to say, you know, right?
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: But from my limited knowledge of reading things like tarot and stuff, there are a lot of different interpretations of love and passion and stuff like that.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: So I feel like it is just not interpreted correctly. For example, I remember when I got my first tarot deck and I was researching a bunch of cards, and I came to lovers, it's a card where there's two people, it's called the lovers, whatever.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA; And I was like oh, gross, it's just going to be allonormative be all about love or whatever
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: But then I read more about the way you can interpretate?
SARAH: Interpret?
KAYLA: The way you can interpret it, and the couple of interpretations I read made it very clear, often this card can be about a partnership between you and a romantic partner or whatever, but you should not always interpret it as that. It can be a bond or a decision to be made between you and a friend, you and work, you and a project you're really passionate about.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: So I guess the lovers card is a lot about choice, the choice between two things or whatever.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Or balance, whatever, you know? On theme.
SARAH: So, libra.
KAYLA: So I just thought that was interesting because I feel like if we re-interpreted all the stuff about libras being super romantic and stuff as just very passionate
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Then it would make a lot more sense for you.
SARAH: Yeah, so I asked Kyla – I just keep calling her my roommate. Her name is Kyla. Not Kayla, Kyla.
KAYLA: So confusing.
SARAH: It's confusing for my grandma.
(laughter)
KAYLA: (laughing) That's funny.
SARAH: Also because Amanda, Miranda, and my sister's best friend is Sarah.
KAYLA: It's a lot.
SARAH: It's a lot for Karen. Anyway. Also, the cats Bogey and Roogie. It's – you know.
KAYLA: Yeah y'all did a bad job.
SARAH: Yeah. Where was I? Oh, okay. Kyla. I asked Kyla. I told her we were recording a podcast today about how I think it's stupid that as an aro libra I'm supposedly romance obsessed, and I said "can you please tell me all that I need to know about libras in this context" and she said "yes." She said "libras are obsessed with romance typically, and uninvolved libras particularly are super desperate and clingy for love. They will take a magnifying glass and fucking look for the smallest fucking straws they can grasp. Idk why, but of all the air signs libras are the most emotional". What does that mean to you, Kayla?
KAYLA: I mean...hm. It's not that you... I mean, you enjoy romance outside of yourself.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I wouldn't say that you're obsessed.
SARAH: No.
KAYLA: Well it's hard because I would say you're a very emotional person on the inside.
SARAH: (quietly) On the inside. Not the outside.
KAYLA: But not on the outside.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So I don't know, that's tough.
SARAH: Yeah, and I think it's the sort of thing with these sort of things, it's always going to be well, anything can apply to anyone if you're vague enough or if it's broad enough, right?
KAYLA: I mean, yeah, sure.
SARAH: So it's like, ah? But it's so interesting to me that it's a thing that libras are supposed to be obsessed with romance and how that's just a normal thing
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SARAH: That no one bats an eye at until you're me and you're an aro libra and you're like "wait a second"
KAYLA: Yeah, I mean I think it's like what I said. Sex sells, and also zodiac signs have become really trendy
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: In the last couple of years or whatever and so you need... like recently my friend got me a notebook and it's like a taurus notebook and the front says "notes from a self-appointed tyrant" right?
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: You need to be able to give what this zodiac is in like three words. Then there's bullet points like foodie, sharp dresser, stubborn, possessive, loyal, jealous streak. They need to be able to put it in just little bullet points.
SARAH: Right.
KAYLA: So you can sell little trinkets and read little articles and stuff
SARAH: I did look up stereotypes about libras and the first thing it says is "libras are infamous for sometimes being indecisive"
KAYLA: Oh.
SARAH: (laughing) Help. I've never made a decision in my life.
KAYLA: That's true.
SARAH: Now I'm reading, this is on wellandgood.com. Lang. I don't know who Lang is, but Lang is saying that "ruled by Venus, the planet of balance and harmony, Libra wants to have drama-free relationships."
KAYLA: That's true.
SARAH: Yeah, and that can totally be applied to every type of relationship.
KAYLA: Yeah. I do often like, there's some zodiac websites that'll break things down into like libra in sex, libra in love, libra in friendships, libra in business, and I think that's nice that they break it up because then you can just disregard stuff that's not about you.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: There's an article about – aw, damn. I found an article again by wellandgood. We're in well and good summer. Anyway.
SARAH: Hm.
KAYLA: Maybe I'm thinking of something else. Anyway, it's like astrologers dispelling the top stereotypes for every sign. The stereotype for libra is indecisive.
SARAH: Hm, well this says – this is Rachel Lang who's an astrologist by the way, she says "one specific area where indecision isn't an issue for libras though is when it comes to falling in love. In fact, these hopeless romantics may very well fall in love with the idea of love, but especially given that they prioritize balance, working to find independence dnece outside of their relationships, and so forth.
KAYLA: Ah! Okay, sorry. I was just typing in Google "why are libras obsessed with" and I was going to type romance, and it autopopulated to taurus. So Sarah, why are you so obsessed with me?
SARAH: (singing) Why you so obsessed with me?
KAYLA: We looked this up last time. Our signs are very compatible.
SARAH: No, I just looked up "why are libras so". Why are libras so fake, why are libras so hot – can't tell you. Why are libras so good in bed? Why are libras so attracted to taurus? Special, nice, angry, rare? Why are libras so flirtatious? How are libras rare? It's a 1 in 12.
KAYLA: Oh my god, there's an article from Vice from 2018 called "libras are shameless flirts who have no idea how manipulative they are". Danny Larkin, who hurt you?
SARAH: Tell me.
KAYLA: Sir. Oh, this person hates libras.
SARAH: I'm reading – this is on popularastrology.com, "why are libras so good in bed? The top 4 reasons explained"
KAYLA: Hm. Tell me everything.
SARAH: "Libra shines in the bedroom with that signature charm and good-natured attitude. They're very sexual too. Most libras will be happy to have sex seven days a week as it fulfills so many of their emotional needs. Libra communicates well and is comfortable using their words and body language to express themselves sexually. They'll tell a partner what they want to experience in bed and tactfully invite their partner to share their desires." That's just good communication.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: "Libra is the sign of marriage and partnerships. And they bring that enthusiasm into their sexual experiences. They truly are in love with being in love and their favorite parts about sex are the mental and emotional bonds."
KAYLA: Hm.
SARAH: "While libra is highly relationship oriented, many people with this sign don't need commitment or attachment to enjoy romantic lovemaking. They need to feel safe, connected, and in the dynamic, balanced give and take."
KAYLA: I have a terrible quote to read.
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: It's from an article in Bustle. The quote is from India Leigh, who is an astrologer.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And India said "the scales represent this air sign, so a romantic match is not so much an option as a requirement"
SARAH: Hm.
KAYLA: Cool.
(20:00)
KAYLA: Oh apparently libra is the quintessential star of the bachelor or bachelorette.
SARAH: Oh, why?
KAYLA: Interesting. Do you like being courted and pursued, Sarah?
SARAH: No.
KAYLA: This article says you do.
SARAH: This article I'm reading says that I'm harmoniously balanced yet highly erotic.
KAYLA: (laughing)
SARAH: This one really has, there are some details that that happen in this one.
KAYLA: Sarah is intelligence really sexy to you?
SARAH: I don't really find anything sexy.
KAYLA: Mm. This point, I don't necessarily agree with when applied broadly, that libras fall in love very quickly, because I do feel like the good friends you have, such as myself
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Were made very quickly.
SARAH: Yeah, that's fair. Why is everyone telling me I'm so erotic?
KAYLA: Yeah, because it's just catchy, I think.
SARAH: Libras are incredibly erotic. Libra prefers to give rather than receive. Libras are creative sexual partners.
KAYLA: If it makes you feel better, I looked up –
SARAH: (laughter)
KAYLA: Yes?
SARAH: (laughing) Sorry, I'm so sorry.
SARAH: Libra's dominant body parts are their lower backs and buttocks.
KAYLA: Okay well that other website told me it was the kidney, so I don't know. I don't know about that.
SARAH: Every person born between September 23rd or whatever to October 22nd
KAYLA: Has a dumpy.
SARAH: Has a dumptruck ass. Anyway, what?
KAYLA: I looked up a ranking of the most sexual signs.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: And this article from yourtango.com said that –
SARAH: I'm also on yourtango.com
KAYLA: Scorpio's first, then aries, then leo, then sagittarius, then taurus, then capricorn – what number are you? You're number 9, so these people...
SARAH: Wait, what are you looking at?
KAYLA: It's a ranking of the most sexual signs.
SARAH: Okay, well.
KAYLA: According to this list, you're number 9.
SARAH: This is also from yourtango.com and it is the zodiac signs that are amazing in bed ranked from best to worst, and libra's number 1.
KAYLA: They need to get their shit together.
SARAH: Crazy. Who's worst?
KAYLA: (whispering) Aries.
SARAH: Virgos. Virgos are the worst.
KAYLA: Okay this list, which is how strong your sex drive is, you're number 11.
SARAH: (laughing) Well, I mean.
KAYLA: So at least that's accurate, I guess.
SARAH: none of this tracks with anything
KAYLA: Where did they get this information? Like who's coming up with this? Obviously from nowhere, but.
SARAH: The stars.
KAYLA: People are just coming up with it, but what are we doing, folks?
SARAH: Can I read you this line? "Yes, libra ladies usually have prominent, curvaceous nether cheeks"
KAYLA: Oh my god.
SARAH: "That beg for a little swat now and again."
KAYLA: I don't like that. I mean, I'm just getting very conflicting messages. When you look at libras ranked with other signs, they're apparently not very sexual. Let me look up romantic, I guess. Don't want to conflate the two.
SARAH: Sexual style. The sophisticated libra is an intellectual and a perfectionist. An excellent bedmate, if a bit detached.
KAYLA: I mean, you probably would be.
SARAH: True.
KAYLA: Yeah. I mean, probably. Okay when I look up rankings of most romantic, libra is a lot higher. So what I'm getting here is that libras aren't necessarily sexual but are very romantic.
SARAH: Well that's what I did get when I was reading, is the good sex comes from the romance part of it.
KAYLA: Hm.
SARAH: So it's less so the ace in me that butts up against the libra, and it's really the aro.
KAYLA: Yeah, but that's why I feel like it's up for interpretation. I feel like you could reinterpret it from very romantic to just very passionate.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: And like a loving person, not necessarily in a romantic way.
SARAH: Yeah, and a person who is a romantic.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Which I think I could certainly fall into that category in a lot of ways.
KAYLA: I think so, you enjoy a romance.
SARAH: Yeah, and also just romanticizing shit.
KAYLA: Yes, that's true.
SARAH: I get the appeal, you know?
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: I want to find like love horoscopes and make them platonic.
KAYLA: I want – I'm sure there's got to be one out there, I would like an aroace astrologer to rewrite
(25:00)
KAYLA: zodiac descriptions in an aroace friendly way, or just like a less allonormative way, you know?
SARAH: Yeah, I concur.
KAYLA: If anyone knows someone like that
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: Let me know. I want to look at my horoscope today. I'm not a libra. I'm a taurus sun, gemini moon, cancer rising.
SARAH: I have to check every single fucking time
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: Sometimes I ask Kyla what I am
KAYLA: I recently committed it to memory because I was so sick of looking it up.
SARAH: Libra sun, leo rising, aquarius moon. I know I'm leo and aquarius, but I always mix up which is which. Let's see.
KAYLA: Okay, not the accuracy right away.
SARAH: Oh, what's happening?
KAYLA: It told me I needed alone time, which is true, because I've been spending a lot of time with people.
SARAH: I see. Well here I'm on the hindustantimes.com, and there, it is tomorrow already so – no, this is for yesterday, okay. So this is yesterday's zodiac. No it's today's zodiac. It's today's zodiac, but it's tomorrow there already.
KAYLA: Make up your mind.
SARAH: You're a torbus
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Where's my torbus? Okay. You're being advised to get rid of anything that isn't benefitting you anymore. Whatever the case may be, your willingness to let go will open the door to a fresh start in your life, whether it's a break-up or a new relationship. Hindustan Times said break up with your boyfriend I'm bored. To find that particular someone, look through your family and friends as well as social media. Take advantage of this down time to focus your attention inside and recharge your batteries.
KAYLA: I would love to, but I have to get on a plane tomorrow, so thanks.
SARAH: I feel like this could be applied in a platonic way of just saying get rid of toxic friendships, you know? Be willing to let go if it's not serving you.
KAYLA: Was that supposed to be my romance horoscope?
SARAH: Love and relationship horoscope.
KAYLA: Oh. I didn't take any of that as romance advice.
SARAH: How about this? Libra.
KAYLA: That just sounded like life advice.
SARAH: (laughing) Yeah. Libra. You're in the midst of a development spurt within your relationships which can produce a sense of astonishment and wonderment. Today in your romantic life, you should be ready to make sacrifices and go the additional mile. If you're in a long distance relationship, it is possible that you will be required to take an impromptu trip that you had not planned to take in order to visit your loved one.
KAYLA: Come visit me!
SARAH: You're not even going to be there.
KAYLA: You could visit me in where I'll be in California.
SARAH: I don't have – I'm busy.
KAYLA: Hm.
SARAH: I'm busy taking my author photos for our book, actually.
KAYLA: I already did that, so can't relate.
SARAH: Okay well some of us had to go home unexpectedly for two weeks, and then our photographer got covid, so.
KAYLA: (laughing) Oh no.
SARAH: Anyway, but I feel like so much of this is, if you take out the automatic romantic nature of it, all of it can be applied to any type of relationship, it's just as you said, sex sells, and spicy salacious stuff sells, and so that's what the headline becomes in these horoscopes even though they could be so much more broadly applicable to relationships in general.
KAYLA: I mean, yeah. I'm looking up right now, I just looked up friendship horoscope, and nothing.
SARAH: Mm.
KAYLA: Some of it, like zodiac friendship compatibility is showing up.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: But love horoscope, relationship horoscope, which obviously relationship can be applied to a lot of different things – but that shows up a ton.
SARAH: Mhm.
KAYLA: Friendship no one cares about, which, you know.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: We know these things, but it just proves once again that – it's kind of a self-perpetuating thing I feel like. People are like "oh no one's going to look up a friendship horoscope, so we won't write it"
SARAH: Right.
KAYLA: And then if people did look it up, nothing would be there so they would stop looking it up, you know?
SARAH: Yeah, as you said, all of these are just "here's your general compatibility with this sign in friendship", there isn't like a "hey this is your horoscope about friendship today"
KAYLA: Yeah, which, I don't know, apparently people feel like they need a lot more advice for romance than friendships.
SARAH: Well, it almost feels like friendships are a given.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Because you're forced to interact with people and even if they're very shallow acquaintanceships and anything, everyone kind of has those interactions, and then romance is the thing people seek out
(30:00)
SARAH: and they prioritize, and it's so important to them and so they're going to be thinking about how they're approaching it and actively trying to get it, to find it.
KAYLA: Well yeah, I think people take friendship for granted, kind of, and then a lot of people are actively searching for romance and they're afraid of dying alone whatever, and they feel like they need all the advice they can get, and I don't think that's the vibes with friendship. The desperation isn't there.
SARAH: Yeah, agreed. My grandma just texted me but because my phone is stupid, or my computer is stupid, it comes up as mom because it thinks I'm my mom but it also thinks I'm my boss Shawn, but I got a text that said it was from mom that says "what year were you born?" and for a second, I forgot that it was my grandma and not my mom, and I was like "I would hope my mother would remember" She was there.
KAYLA: I don't know, sometimes my parents forget what year I was born, so.
SARAH: My grandma, I'll give her a pass. Yeah. If anyone out there has a horoscope that is aroace friendly, I think that'd be great and fun.
KAYLA: Yeah, I need an aroace astrologer.
SARAH: (laughing) If from no one else other than libras, you will get active participation from your friendly neighborhood aspecs.
KAYLA: There's so many horoscope and astrology Instagrams out there. I would like to see an aroace astrology...
SARAH: Exactly.
KAYLA: Gram. I would follow that.
SARAH: Exactly. And you know, it could include... because you know with horscopes it's always like if you're in a committed relationship, this, if you're blah blah blah, then this and it could be like if you're in a QPR, then this. If you're an asexual who is sex-neutral, then this. I think that would be fun.
KAYLA: You know what we haven't even begun to talk about, is how gender binary zodiacs are.
SARAH: Oh, yeah.
KAYLA: It's always like "leo men are like this but leo women are like this" and you have different traits. What if you're neither?
SARAH: When it's love based too.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: It always assumes the people who are into the horoscope or reading the horoscope are straight. And yeah, it's kind of normal for that to be the assumption. Stupid, but normal. But I think it's even more so because the people they think will be into this are straight.
KAYLA: I don't know man, the gays love astrology.
SARAH: I think the gays love it too.
KAYLA: I think the gays love it more.
SARAH: I think we should pander to the gays more.
KAYLA: To be honest I feel like the people I know who are ...
SARAH: The most into it?
KAYLA: Yeah. Are queer. I don't know.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: I also haven't done any research on this, but I would be willing to bet that male zodiacs, their descriptions are more about sex and female ones are more about romance.
SARAH: I'm sure.
KAYLA: I would be willing to guess, but have no basis for that.
SARAH: And then the male ones are all ooga chaka ooga chaka and then, you know.
KAYLA: So true.
SARAH: Also, how many male astrologists are there?
KAYLA: I don't know.
SARAH: I was looking at one of the articles, and the name of the author said it was Loren, and I looked at the picture and it looked like what my little brain would assume is a man. I don't know the gender identity of this person, but they did have a beard, and I was just like "oh, a person with a beard wrote this astrology article?"
KAYLA: Yeah the assumption is that it's a very feminine...
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: You know it's astrology girlfriend stock boyfriend, you know?
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: Astrology girlfriend stock market boyfriend.
SARAH: Oh, I thought you meant like stock photo.
KAYLA: Maybe.
SARAH: And I didn't know what was going on. Yeah astrology girlfriend stock market boyfriend. The stock market is the astrology of straight men.
KAYLA: It really is though.
SARAH: Yeah. What's my equivalent of astrology since I don't put so much stock – haha, stock. Since I don't put much stock into astrology, what's my equivalent?
KAYLA: BTS
SARAH: I was about to say it but like what about BTS?
KAYLA: I don't know
(35:00)
SARAH: Just like whether or not they post on Instagram?
KAYLA: Just all of it.
SARAH: (laughing) All of it.
KAYLA: You should start making life decisions based on like "well, they didn't post today so can't, sorry. Bad vibes"
SARAH: I can't do x thing until Jimin comes home. Sorry, can't do it.
KAYLA: Sorry. In conclusion, allonormative once again.
SARAH: In conclusion, allonormativity is foolish and I would like an aroace astronomy account to get my horoscope from. If one already exists –
KAYLA: Not astronomy
SARAH: Did I say astronomy?
KAYLA: Astrology.
SARAH: Did I say astronomy?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Well I did take two astronomy classes in college
KAYLA: As did I, and I hated them. I would not like anything astronomy near me.
SARAH: In theory I like astronomy. It has too much math.
KAYLA: In practice, with the most arrogant professors I have ever had the misfortune of learning from? No.
SARAH: I just took it because I needed the math.
KAYLA: Math.
SARAH: and I didn't want to take another math class.
KAYLA: That is also why I took it.
SARAH: Anyway, astrology. You know what? If you're an aroace astronomer, you tell me what the stars say about me. I want to know.
KAYLA: But like don't be an asshole about it.
SARAH: (laughing) Yeah, Kayla had some real poor experiences with astro professors
KAYLA: I had a lot. You know the professors that are so clearly there for research and never learned how to teach, but also they think they're the best because they study stars or whatever? Like, get over yourself. Anyway.
SARAH: And they're like "well I work at a research university". Well you also have to teach me how black holes so
KAYLA: I think the reputation that University of Michigan gets as a very arrogant school comes solely from the astronomy department.
SARAH: And ROSS. And the business school.
KAYLA: And the engineering school. And the music/arts school.
SARAH: Mm, engineering? I feel like not to the same extent of like, ROSS.
KAYLA: not to the same extent, but I feel like it depends on the engineering concentration.
SARAH: maybe I'm just biased based on the engineers I know who went there. Anyway.
KAYLA: Yeah, but – anyway.
SARAH: This has devolved. This has truly devolved. October is a great month to be born but being a libra? Mm, kind of sucks. At least I'm not a ... fill in the blank with whatever the most hated sign is.
KAYLA: So true.
SARAH: I thought you were saying Sagittarius in a really weird way.
KAYLA: No, I don't really know much about them.
SARAH: I don't either. Anyway. Thank you for joining us on this adventure. It maybe sucked, but we're here. What's our poll for this week?
KAYLA: I think we should ask people how accurate they find...
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: ...their zodiac to be.
SARAH: Especially – I was going to say especially if you're aspec. Most of our listeners are.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: But if you're not aspec and you're a libra or you're something that talks about romance, I would be interested to know your take on that. Great. Kayla, what is your beef and your juice this week?
KAYLA: Man, it's tough to say since we did just do this.
SARAH: Because we did just do it yesterday.
KAYLA: Yesterday. Let's see... my beef is I have a little headache and I want it to go away.
SARAH: Uh oh.
KAYLA: My juice is that it's going to be in the high 90s in Boston this week, but I will not be here, so I won't have to deal with it and I'm going somewhere that's like in the 60s and 70s so.
SARAH: Fuck you.
KAYLA: Very excited for that.
SARAH: (sighs) My beef... so I don't know if I've mentioned on this podcast. I like Parade. It's a brand. I've bought things from them.
KAYLA: I have a discount code. You want it?
SARAH: Yeah, we won't talk about that. I can't address the fact that Kayla had never bought a Parade product and I had been raving about them for months, and then she becomes a brand ambassador? Anyway.
KAYLA: Use code kayla_kas for 20% off.
SARAH: (laughing) And I will. However, they came out with a new line called Naked and it had like 6 different flavors of nude colors, which is good because you know, it's good for...people have skin of different colors, and as a person who's very pale, the nude colors of things are always way too dark on me, so I was like "oh my god, this is exciting"
(40:00)
SARAH: I got this bra, it's great. And then my washing machine at it because my washing machine likes to attack my clothing with great malice. It has destroyed many a clothing item. And I was like, okay, fuck that shit, I'm going to replace this, so I went on the website, and they didn't have it. And I sent them an email and I said "uhh, hello?" and they said "yeah actually the Naked line was a limited edition thing, so we don't have it anymore, but I'll let them know that you expressed interest in it being a more permanent thing" and I was like "bitch." Here's the thing. People have skin year-round.
KAYLA: I disagree.
SARAH: Are they not aware of this?
KAYLA: I disagree.
SARAH: People have skin year round! How is your new line, your inclusive new line, how is that limited edition? Anyway my other beef is that I got a new filling a couple of weeks ago and before I got the filling it didn't really bother me, but recently, I bit something weird and I think I fucked up my filling, and now the filling does bother me. And it would be one thing if prior to the filling it was bothering me and now it's still bothering me, but prior to the filling it wasn't bothering me, and now it is!
KAYLA: I have had this happen to me. It's not fun.
SARAH: My juice is... Classic. Cherry coke. You can tell us about your beef, your juice, your friendly neighborhood libras on our social media @soundsfakepod. We also have a Patreon, patreon.com/soundsfakepod, and you will be hearing about our patrons from Sarah from the future. Get ready.
SARAH: (imitates fast forward sound) You know what time it is. It's Sarah from the future. Here with your patrons. Our $2 patrons, we have a new one, it's SpaceBen. What a delight. Are you in space? Are you enjoying it? I hope so. Our $5 patrons who we are promoting this week are Byron Rusnak, Chris Lauretano, Colleen Walsh, Corinne, and Daniel Walker. Our $10 patrons who are promoting something this week are David Nurse, who is promoting just the use of public transportation. Gas prices may be going down, but public transportation is still good. Derek and Carissa who – now here's the thing. Someone asked me if it was their time this week, that they would like to promote their dad's birthday. I think it was Carissa of Derek and Carissa fame, but here's the thing. A lot of people's names in Discord are not the names that we use for them on Patreon. So maybe I'm wishing father Derek a happy birthday? Maybe I'm wishing someone else a happy birthday. I don't know. Either way, I hope you have a happy one. CinnamonToastPunch who would like to promote rainy walks with friends and splashing in puddles, my Aunt Jeannie who would like to promote Christopher's Haven, and Maggie Capalbo who would like to promote their dogs Leia, Minnie, and Loki. Our other $5 patrons are Arcnes, Ari K., Benjamin Ybarra, Changeling and Alex the ace cat, David Jay, Martin Chiesl, Mattie, Potater, Purple Hayes, Rosie Costello, Barefoot Backpacker, the Steve, and Zirklteo, who – they have messaged to say that they also don't know how to say their name, but turns out I was spelling it wrong, so that was impacting things, and they told me like two weeks ago what they wanted to promote but I just didn't see it because I can't read, so I will do their promotion this week, and they would like to promote that England isn't real. Our $15 patrons are Andrew Hillum who would like to promote The Invisible Spectrum Podcast, Click4Caroline who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, Dia Chappell who would like to promote Twitch.tv/MelodyDia, Hector Murillo who would like to promote friends that are supportive, constructive, and help you grow as a better person, Keziah Root whose name I have been pronouncing correctly who said they wanted to change their promotion, but didn't tell me what it was yet. Nathaniel White who NathanielJWhitedesigns.com. You know it, come on. Kayla's Aunt Nina who would like to promote @katemaggart.art, and Sara Jones who is @eternalloli everywhere. Our $20 patrons, Sabrina Hauck, Merry Christmas from your mom and dad. This is why I was confused. What if it's Sabrina, you know? I don't think it's Sabrina because we say Sabrina every week, and this person said if it's their turn, which leads me to believe it's Carissa of Derek and Carissa fame. Please tell me. It was too awkward for me to ask in the chat. Let me know. And Dragonfly who would like to promote just asking questions on main instead of just asking them to the person. Thanks for – nope. Well, thanks for listening, but I got to go back to the past. Okay, bye.
SARAH: (rewind sound) Hello, it's Sarah from the past. Thanks to our patrons. Wow!
(clapping)
KAYLA: Wow!
SARAH: Because we weren't doing patrons, I didn't pull up the intro/outro doc, and now I'm in a pickle. I'm in a tizzy because I can't remember
KAYLA: Thank you so much for listening. Tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears.
SARAH: Okay first of all, it's just thanks for listening, we're not going to thank them so much.
KAYLA: Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday.
SARAH: Thanks for listening
KAYLA: No, I wanted to do it!
SARAH: Tune in next Sunday – okay, you do my part and I'll do yours.
KAYLA: Okay, fine.
SARAH: I'm looking at it now.
KAYLA: Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears.
SARAH: Until then, take good care of your bovines.
KAYLA: Weird.
(45:55)