Ep 227: Are Soulmates Real?

Episode 227: Soulmates

August 28, 2022

(00:00)

SARAH: Hey what's up hello, welcome to Sounds fake but Okay, a podcast where an aroace girl, I'm Sarah that's me

KAYLA: And a bi demisexual girl, that's me Kayla

SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don't understand 

KAYLA: On today's episode: soulmates.

SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds fake, but okay 

(theme music plays) 

SARAH: Welcome back to the pod!

KAYLA: You've made it!

SARAH: Yes. Did they overcome something, or is this just like...?

KAYLA: You made it back

SARAH: thank God

KAYLA: You made it through another week 

SARAH: You did! Congratulations!

KAYLA: Good job.

SARAH: Kayla? 

KAYLA: Yeah?

SARAH: Should we keep our house?

KAYLA: I think we have a big house to keep.

SARAH: Yeah, it's another real big one. How we going to pay the mortgage on this thing?

KAYLA: Oh, hopefully with the money we get from our book sales. 

SARAH: There we go!

KAYLA: (laughing) Segue. 

SARAH: Beautiful. 

KAYLA: As you may have heard at the very top of this episode, before the episode started, and as you may have seen from our livestream that happened yesterday, if you're listening to this the day that it came out, our book is now available for pre-order!

SARAH: Yay! It's a real book

KAYLA: So you should do that

SARAH: With real pages, and real words inside. 

KAYLA: So true. I don't know how many pages.

SARAH: No. I don't either.

KAYLA: But, at least 2. 

SARAH: At least 2. I would wager even 3. 

KAYLA: Ooh, I don't know. That may be pushing it.

SARAH: (laughing) That might be too much. But yeah. Our book soundsfakepod.com/book, you can find out anything and everything that you need to know. You can look at it and say "that's how you spell Kayla's last name"

KAYLA: (laughing) Yeah. Even our publisher struggled with it. It's okay. 

SARAH: Yeah the first draft of the book cover did in fact have Kayla's name spelled wrong

KAYLA: Alas.

SARAH: But you know, we live and we learn. We grow. 

KAYLA: Mhm. 

SARAH: But yeah, the book is called Sounds Fake but Okay subtitle, subtitle, subtitle. I should probably memorize the subtitle. 

KAYLA: It's really hard. It's so long. And like, it's my fault. 

SARAH: It is your fault, but you know what, it's fine. Sounds Fake but Okay: an asexual and aromantic perspective on love, relationships, sex, and pretty much anything else. Put that in my brain. It won't stay there, but we'll try. But it's called Sounds Fake but Okay. Sounds book but okay, sounds fake but okay. 

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: It's coming. February 21st, 2023. And if you're listening to this after that, go get the book! It's out there!

KAYLA: Yeah, what are you doing? Go get it!

SARAH: Go get it! Mkay. 

KAYLA: Yeah. And it comes with exclusive episodes. Each chapter of the book will have an episode that goes along with it where we talk about the writing of that chapter.

SARAH: Mhm. 

KAYLA: Probably only the people that listen to this regularly will care about those episodes, but that's okay. You guys will have a fun little secret time. 

SARAH: Yeah, we did that for you 

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: We didn't do that for the randos

KAYLA: No.

SARAH: We did that for you

KAYLA: For the die hard fans

SARAH: For the die hard fans. Okay, great. It's been a long process and a lot of people have put a lot of work into it, so I don't know, throw a couple dollars at it. Kayla, what are we talking about this week?

KAYLA: This week, we're talking about (yawning) me yawning and also we're talking about soulmates

SARAH: I kind of thought you were going to start that over, but no, you just powered through

KAYLA: Mhm.

SARAH: Yeah we're talking about soulmates. This has come up on the pod before, but I don't think we've done a dedicated episode. 

KAYLA: No, I don't think so. I'm sure it's come up. 

SARAH: Yeah. So where should we start?

KAYLA: Well, the reason we thought of doing this was an article that you found, I believe. 

SARAH: (laughing) Oh my god, I forgot about that

KAYLA: So I think that would be a silly way to start. I've also looked up some light history about the origin of soulmates

SARAH: Oh my goodness

KAYLA: This could've been a very well researched episode, but I'm not a professor of family studies or relationship studies, so. 

SARAH: Well you're doing better than me, because I straight up forgot about this article that we talked about less than 24 hours ago. 

KAYLA: Literally yesterday, yeah. 

SARAH: It was yesterday. 

KAYLA: Sarah and I are doing a lot. We had a business meeting yesterday, we're doing the livestream on Saturday. For you it's already happened, for us it has not. Sarah and I are talking a lot this week. 

SARAH: We had to talk about taxes. 

KAYLA: It was so upsetting. We had to consult Sarah's dad. 

SARAH: Who, for the record, is not a tax professional. 

KAYLA: He's just a dad

(05:00) 

SARAH: He's just a dad

KAYLA: But like, from what I know of dads, that does make you a tax professional

SARAH: Yeah. As soon as you have a child -- 

KAYLA: My understanding is, yeah, as soon as you have a child you like -- 

SARAH: You become a tax professional

KAYLA: Turbotax calls you immediately. 

SARAH: Turbotax who? Anyway. Nothing to do with that. Let's talk about soulmates. Let's start with this article. I don't know that I found it. Maybe you found it. Somebody found it. 

KAYLA: Who's to say?

SARAH: It was found. 

KAYLA: Maybe it was in the discord?

SARAH: I have no idea

KAYLA: Oh by the way, speaking of book, we have a whole channel in our discord dedicated to the book if you want to discuss

SARAH: Yeah, I had a hard time finding it. 

KAYLA: That's okay. 

SARAH: It's Sarah-proof

KAYLA: (laughing) I didn't want Sarah to find it

SARAH: Mkay. Okay, so this article is from the Sydney Morning Herald. It is from April of 2022. And it is called "Less than a month after I met my soulmate, I ended my 14 year marriage". The article's not... I think we can read it, it's not that long. Let me just ... is everyone ready? 

KAYLA: No, but yes. 

SARAH: Mkay. I wasn’t expecting a formal dinner with cheerful conference attendees in the beautiful West Australian town of Margaret River to turn my life upside down. I had a good life. I wasn’t looking to upend it – or was I?

KAYLA: Dun dun dun 

SARAH: I had decided only the week earlier to attend the three-day event with my husband. It wasn’t in the family holiday plan and we had to arrange care for the children, but I saw it as a perfect opportunity for us to reconnect, as we had become quite distant. I believed that time away from the stress of everyday life was the perfect remedy to reignite our relationship. We entered the magnificent oak-panelled dining room, -- this,  really trying to be a writer here -- Amanda Trenfield. 

KAYLA: You tell her

SARAH: taking our seats at a long, elegantly laid table. My husband sat to my left and quickly engaged another couple in conversation. As I settled into my seat, I looked up and immediately lost my breath. When our eyes met there was an instant familiarity that ran deeper than water-cooler chat. These eyes had locked before. Twelve years earlier. His name was Jason. I hadn’t forgotten.

KAYLA: Mm. Not Jason!

SARAH: Throughout the dinner, I was my usual animated and conversational self. I was, after all, in sales. 

KAYLA: Oh, not sales. 

SARAH: The group chatted happily, all of us enjoying an excellent degustation 

KAYLA: Ew, stop! Ew

SARAH: (laughing) of West Australian delicacies cooked with attention and pride. I hate the way this is written. I hate it so much. 

KAYLA: You have to stop. 

SARAH: As the entrée was served, Jason offered me a sip of his wine to taste the robust old-vine shiraz. 

KAYLA: That word should not be allowed. 

SARAH: After a little banter and coaxing, I accepted. Over the course of the evening, my attraction to Jason developed. I soon became aware of his every breath and I unconsciously mirrored his pace. I caught myself, embarrassingly, looking at his chest through his slim-fitted white evening shirt. Yes, he had a fit, toned and attractive body, but it was his chest I was drawn to?

KAYLA: No!

SARAH: No, no, no, I read that wrong. Yes, he had a fit, toned and attractive body, but was it his chest I was drawn to? Sorry, I had to re-deliver that

KAYLA: Yeah, thank you. I really don't know what I would've done.

SARAH: We need to clarify. When dessert was served, he offered me a sample of his decadent and oozy chocolate pudding. I declined, but he

KAYLA: I don't want to be here anymore

SARAH: (laughing) scooped up a generous spoonful and fed me across the table anyway. He displayed a level of familiarity normally reserved for close friends or lovers. If anyone had been watching us, they would have been at least curious as to the nature of our relationship. Isn't your husband sitting next to you?

KAYLA: That's my question. Weren't you with your husband?

SARAH: By the time the group left the restaurant late in the evening, all my senses were on high alert. It was abundantly clear that the energy between Jason and me was somehow charged. I instinctively understood, though, that this was more than just lust, something I had felt many times before. I also understood that it was more than simply physical attraction, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it. At the hotel bar, Jason bought me a glass of my favourite rosé. 

KAYLA: Not the bar

SARAH: We looked into each other’s eyes – his dark and mysterious, mine big and brown –

(laughter)

SARAH: I think they're going for like doe eyes? I think is what they're going for?

KAYLA: Big. And. Brown

SARAH: (laughing) Big and brown!

KAYLA: Big and brown

SARAH: (laughing) and clinked glasses. The electricity between us was strong and raw. It travelled to my core. It was so intense I needed to break eye contact. He. We. The energy. It was electric. My body was completely charged. 

KAYLA: Where is your husband?

SARAH: I was completely “on”. I had to determinedly fight the continual pull to his side that I felt. As we moved around each other 

(10:00) 

SARAH: throughout the evening in various conversations, though, we were always aware of one another’s location. When we locked eyes across the room, the intensity of our stares magnified, becoming bolder as the night progressed. We held our gaze longer. Our connection deepened. I loved talking with him. I felt warm, relaxed and safe in his presence. I felt I could truly be myself, at a level I wasn’t familiar with. 

KAYLA: You know when I also feel warm and relaxed? Is when I'm drunk. Ma'am you've already said how much you've been drinking. 

SARAH: (laughing) Stop drinking

KAYLA: Those are also the feelings I feel when I'm drunk.

SARAH: Amazing. I felt I could truly be myself, at a level I wasn’t familiar with. 

KAYLA: And the level that I am when I'm drunk. Like, hello? Sorry. 

SARAH: I realized that it was a feeling I hadn’t enjoyed in a long, long time – perhaps ever. Sure, we were laughing and joking like old friends but the deepening connection through our eyes was undeniable. My behavior that evening was uncharacteristic. I stayed out way longer than I normally would; I’m usually an early-to-bed, early-to-rise type. But this was no ordinary evening. I was in no hurry to lose our connection. In fact, I wanted time to stand still. I wanted to remain in the energy, our energy, forever.

KAYLA: (disgusted) No.

SARAH: The bar called last drinks, and the evening (now the early morning) came to an end. The goodbye was overt, open and revealing of our mutual affection. We enjoyed a body-hugging embrace -- well, it's an embrace, of course it's body-hugging -- 

KAYLA: (rapidly) What? What? What? What? What? 

SARAH: We enjoyed a body-hugging embrace where I whispered into his ear, “This isn’t over, I need to see you again.” He put his hands tightly on my waist and pulled me close. “Yes,” he replied. It was all I needed to hear. As I danced back to my room feeling vulnerable but also unexpectedly whole, I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face. I had never felt anything like this before. I had never experienced this sensation. I didn’t understand the energy. It was like an out-of-body, or perhaps an “in-body”, experience. I know now without hesitation, without question, without any doubt in my mind, my body or my heart, that the energy we experienced that evening was our souls connecting. I left Margaret River a different woman. I knew in my heart, in my soul, in the very fabric of my being that I had profoundly changed. I couldn’t articulate the feelings, the sensations, the experience. The connectedness I experienced with Jason was at a level impossible to describe. All I knew for certain was that this one encounter, in the most unlikely of places, under the most unusual of circumstances, had dramatically altered my life. The next few days were a complete blur. I couldn’t make any sense of my feelings. I couldn’t escape unrelenting thoughts of Jason. I certainly couldn’t fathom how I’d resume my normal life: a full-time career in financial services, the care of two young children, household chores, social engagements, being a wife. What I did understand was that the successful, comfortable and somewhat predictable life I had spent 20 years building was now of no consequence. I simply didn’t care. I’d just met my soulmate. What could possibly be more important than that? Less than a month after meeting Jason, having had no communication with him since our time in Margaret River, I ended my 14-year relationship with my husband. The woman who had always been so careful, so planned, so organized and so clear about the path her life would take, had just made the most dramatic decision of her life, one affecting those dearest to her – her family. This is an excerpt from a thing, so it stops there. 

KAYLA: Imagine being her child. 

SARAH: I know! Here's the thing. First of all, it's unclear to me. Had she met this guy before?

KAYLA: Well she said something about 12 years earlier

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: Which makes it seem like yes, but then there's no follow-up to that

SARAH: There's no follow-up at all. Also -- I was like, do they see each other again but then I realized that's how she gets you to buy her book, which I want to. Buy my book instead. 

KAYLA: True.

SARAH: So you felt this connection with this guy, and as a result you said, "I am going to divorce my husband" and -- well, not leave my family, but "I'm going to upend my entire family structure because I realized the person I'm married to isn't my soulmate. There's nothing wrong with our relationship. It's gotten a little boring." Will she end up with this person? Who knows? She doesn't care. She just wants to end this relationship that will upend her children's lives. 

KAYLA: Listen. I could understand her feeling this connection with some random person and it making her realize "Oh I haven't felt this in my marriage in a long time"

SARAH: Mhm.

KAYLA: Like, maybe something is wrong

SARAH: Yeah.

KAYLA: That like, okay, but the thing that gets me is that she meets him for like 

(15:00) 

KAYLA: a couple hours

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: And then she's like "this is my soulmate, our souls have connected" and that is what I do not understand

SARAH: Yeah, and I just don't understand how...

KAYLA: Like how do you know? You know?

SARAH: I just -- the extra wild thing to me is that her husband was there with her

KAYLA: I know!

SARAH: They went to this event because she wanted to have some time with her husband to maybe reconnect a little bit

KAYLA: Then she was like "goodbye"

SARAH: I just --

KAYLA: What was her husband doing this whole time? Just being like "um, ma'am?"?

SARAH: Last I heard he was talking to another couple at dinner. That's the last I heard of him. 

KAYLA: I hope he went home with them or something. This poor man. 

SARAH: Me too. I hope he had a good time. I just think this encapsulates all the things I completely fail to understand about this whole soulmate concept.

KAYLA: (sighs) Yeah. Because I feel like it kind of goes along with the whole love at first sight situation

SARAH: Absolutely

KAYLA: Because those are often paired 

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: Of like when you know you know and also there is this idea of there is only one person for every person

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: It's a very monogamous idea. 

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: I feel like often it also falls into kind of the opposites attract trope which can also get really heteronormative in some ways.

SARAH: I also thing become it is so monogamy based, it is so romance and sex based. We'll get into this later, but you don't really hear about platonic soulmates. Maybe a little bit more now.

KAYLA: I feel like there has been a shift. I hear people talking about twin flames a lot, which I don't know the origin of...

SARAH: Well we'll get to that. That's later. 

KAYLA: Okay, okay. 

SARAH: I have a thought that I want to say first

KAYLA: Alright.

SARAH: But because it's so associated with romantic/sexual whatever, I feel like you often here these stories, as with Amanda, that they're seeing someone else and then they just meet their supposed soulmate, and then they just drop this other person

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: With no consideration for the person that they're dropping. And like, I get it. If you meet someone that you're just like "this person is it". I understand that, but it's just the thought that "well this person is my soulmate so I have to drop this other person. It doesn't matter how good our relationship is, and it doesn't matter how happy I was prior. Like this is my soulmate, this is what the universe is telling me to do, therefore I can only have this one person. 

KAYLA: Yeah. 

SARAH: I don't like that. 

KAYLA: No. 

SARAH: I do think there has been a rise in talk of platonic soulmates. A prime example, guess what Kayla. 

KAYLA: I don't know

SARAH: You know?

KAYLA: (incoherent mumbling)

SARAH: What?

KAYLA: I don't want to know

SARAH: Oh you don't want to know. Well too bad because I'm about to talk about BTS.

KAYLA: (groans)

SARAH: Two of the members of BTS, I'll use their stage names for clarity, V and Jimin refer to each other as their soulmates and they have a song that is just the two of them where they say "you are my soulmate" in it. And of course, there are the people who are like "they're in love". The shippers, but it is very much they are a pair. But the thing that I like about that and something that I've also seen -- I feel like soulmates is a pretty common trope in fanfiction, and whenever I see that trope, I'm like eh, but I have found there are times when I do like it is when -- The thing about the soulmate trope is it can't be too easy. Everyone always talks about it like it's easy. But obviously two people, even if you're "soulmates," you're not going to click and line up on every single thing immediately.

KAYLA: Right

SARAH: With the instance of Vimin from BTS, they fought a lot when they were younger, but that made them closer because they had to learn how to 

(20:00) 

SARAH: deal with each other. And I feel like that sort of stuff, or -- I do like the soulmate trope when it's like you find out this is your soulmate and you're like "fuck that dude. I don't like that guy at all" or "I don't like this concept, it's stupid"

KAYLA: Yeah. I know we did an episode at one point of kind of TikTok POV and those skits

SARAH: Mm. 

KAYLA: And a lot of them are soulmate based

SARAH: Mm

KAYLA: Of like, you get to design your soulmate, or there's something that happens that tells you who your soulmate is, and a lot of times it is kind of that enemies to lovers situation

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: That we also talked about

SARAH: Yeah and at least that's more interesting because you have gone through trials to prove this is still the relationship that you want. And I do like, I feel like it's been talked about a little more now in fiction spaces, that you don't have to be with your soulmate forever. You're not bound to them, and shit can go wrong, and that's like a human relationship. One of the things that I really don't like about the concept of soulmates, the way it's thought about generally, is that it's not fluid at all. Like this is your person, and if you fuck it up you fucked it up

KAYLA: Yeah, it kind of takes away your agency

SARAH: Yeah, you have no agency. 

KAYLA: in the situation of like this is this person that you or someone else has decided is your soulmate and no matter what you're supposed to be staying with them, and if you leave, that's it. Your one chance is gone. 

SARAH: You've failed

KAYLA: It kind of takes away from the correct people are supposed to be in your life at the correct times, or like you said, there's going to be human error and with some people it's not going to work out. You know what I mean?

SARAH: Yeah. You can have two people that love each other very much but it just for whatever reasons in the context of their relationship, it's not going to work

KAYLA: Right

SARAH: And that doesn't mean that that relationship is any less important or less impactful

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: But with this idea of soulmates it's like you have to stay together forever

KAYLA: I think what I enjoy more about the idea of platonic soulmates too is because we don't see friendship as a monogamous situation

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: But we do see typically romance that way

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: Is you can have a platonic soulmate and still have other friends

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: But when you are prescribed a romantic soulmate, that is supposed to be the one

SARAH: Yes

KAYLA: And that's it. It takes away from any other possibility of having more than one soulmate at the same time or several soulmates over your entire life

SARAH: Yeah. And it also, if it's a platonic soulmate, it doesn't preclude you from having romantic relationships, other platonic relationships, but I feel like if it's romantic soulmates it's like this person is on a pedestal, this person is above everyone.

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: This is the most important person in my life, full stop, just because they're my soulmate and that's it. 

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: And I just don't like that mindset. If that person turns out to be the most important person to you in your life for your entire life and that's what ends up happening, great. But it should be because of your relationship not because they're your soulmate or they're your boyfriend, or they're your girlfriend, or they're your partner

KAYLA: Right

SARAH: It should be because of the relationship you have and that you've built

KAYLA: Yeah. Can I share some history with you?

SARAH: Please. 

KAYLA: So I was looking up the origin of soulmates, and I found an article, a blog, on the Institute for Family Studies, which feels familiar to me. 

SARAH: Mm. 

KAYLA: I feel like we must have read something from here before. by Bradley Onishi, and it just goes through some of the basics of the history, but I will read you some of it. One of the early uses of the word soulmate comes from the poet Samuel Taylor Colridge in a letter from 1822. He said "to be happy in married life, you must have a soulmate" And it says for Colridge, a successful marriage needed to be about more than 

(25:00) 

KAYLA: economic or social compatibility, it required a spiritual connection. Which, I'm not a historian, but I feel like for 1822 that might have been a pretty novel concept. I feel like in 1822, love marriages were still not the norm

SARAH: Yeah, and it is the beginning of what I find to be a harmful notion that your partner is like your other half, as in you're not whole or not complete without them

KAYLA: Speaking of

SARAH: By all means

KAYLA: I can tell you where that comes from or the origins of that idea. There is a Greek myth

SARAH: Not the Greeks

KAYLA: From the Ancient Greeks' time. Plato has this text the Symposium

SARAH: The guy with the closet? 

KAYLA: Heh. Shut up. 

SARAH: That was a funny joke that I made

KAYLA: No, it wasn't. So this character in the Symposium tells the story of soulmates, and it's this mythology where humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces

SARAH: Mm, oh yeah I did know this

KAYLA: Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate pieces condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other half

SARAH: I mean I do kind of like that better than the Eve came from Adam's rib

KAYLA: Yeah that's a very similar thing I think

SARAH: It is but at least you are equally

KAYLA: Equally halved, yeah

SARAH: Belonging to each other, yeah.

KAYLA: Yeah the article in Family Studies also talks about Judaism and Christianity how there's a passage in the Hebrew Bible I guess that says "for your maker is your husband"

SARAH: mm

KAYLA: So I think that's getting at that kind of Adam and Eve idea

SARAH: Ugh, everything is so Eurocentric though. I'm just sitting here thinking like what African tribes hundreds of years ago, what their conception of shit was

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: But that's not readily available to me

KAYLA: Well that's what I'm wondering

SARAH: (laughing) What about the Mayans?

KAYLA: True. I'm sure there must be writing about this

SARAH: I'm sure

KAYLA: In an academic sense, but 

SARAH: But it's not nearly as easily accessible as 

KAYLA: Right. I have to imagine there is some reason that these creation myths are created in this way of the two equal halves

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: In my mind, not to be cynical, but it must be some sort of the higher power trying to control the lives of your average citizens and making sure they are paired off by two into families, you know what I mean?

SARAH: Mhm. Yeah. 

KAYLA: Like we don't just come up with these creation myths out of nothing, you know what I mean?

SARAH: No. No as in yes. Yes, I know what you mean

KAYLA: Yes

SARAH: And god saw how good it was

KAYLA: Stories and media are used in large part to either control the cultural narrative and make it say how it is or to shake things up but I think creation myths are the start of that kind of culture so they're obviously not trying to change norms. So it's like, what were they trying to do, you know?

SARAH: Your brain is so big. 

KAYLA: I know

SARAH: Congratulations. 

KAYLA: Thank you. Not big enough to answer the question, just big enough to ask it.

SARAH: Just big enough to ask it. You know what? Big enough to know your limits.

KAYLA: Mm, I love that for me. Is it to break up a tribal system where it's trying to get more to an Industrial Revolution type of situation, where we have "productive families" of like two parents rather than more of a community based raising system? Like what are we doing?

SARAH: I am wondering, because western cultural norms, specifically American cultural norms are so individualized, it's all about the individual. Are these soulmate, pairing-off, less community based myths, ideas about connection more prevalent in a culture such as ours because it's less about the community and more about the individual?

KAYLA: Mm, I don't know though. Because from what I know about Indian culture with our good friends who I've had extensive conversations with about marriage and the culture there

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: I don't know that it's so much a soulmate situation, but in a lot of traditional 

(30:00) 

KAYLA: marriages they will bring in an astrologer

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: To make sure your stars line up

SARAH: To make sure that it's a match, yeah

KAYLA: Right. From what I understand of Indian culture, that kind of community and family based, rather than being super individualistic. It is less individualistic than American culture, for example

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: But they still do have traditions in that way, but everyone is welcome to tell me I'm wrong, that's just what I understand from conversations I've had, but

SARAH: Yeah. Another harmful thing about this soulmate idea, and this is true regardless of how community based a culture or a group is, is that people get stuck in relationships

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: That are bad and abusive and they feel they can't leave, whether that's because they're like "this is my soulmate, I have to stay with them", like they feel obligated, or it's society imposing that upon you

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: Like "no that's your person, you can't leave them" and there's also another angle of like it looks bad for your family, that's another thing, but I think that's all kind of melded in with the "this is your person, you can't leave them"

KAYLA: Well, and I think that's another thing that just pressures people to get married before they're ready or something, or settle for someone they aren't really compatible or happy with because they feel that pressure to find that one person by a certain point in their life. 

SARAH: Mhm. And I get wanting to find that person and maximize your time with that person, I understand that aspect of it, but also it frustrates me that so many people think there's a certain timeline you have to do things on, and if you don't do that, you have failed or you're embarrassing, or I don't even know. Expectations are stupid. 

KAYLA: Yeah. 

SARAH: Punch them in the guts

KAYLA: I agree. Another thing I've seen talked about a lot more recently is the idea of a twin flame

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: So I looked up the difference, and it is a little confusing

SARAH: Oh boy.

KAYLA: Because -- I'm looking at the website mindbodygreen.com

SARAH: Oh

KAYLA: So apparently what we were discussing earlier about the two halves

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: That is actually more of the idea of a twin flame apparently, where you have one soul split into two bodies

SARAH: Mhm

KAYLA: So in a twin flame relationship, it's just someone who is very similar to you. So they might mirror your issues, unhealthy habits, imbalances, so that could cause tension in that relationship or friendship. Soulmates on the other hand, are two souls that are extraordinarily linked. So two separate souls

SARAH: mm

KAYLA: That are just drawn to each other? I guess?

SARAH: So soulmates is like "congrats you have your own soul" twin flame is like "you got to share this thing"

KAYLA: Yes. Apparently soulmates cannot also be twin flames because that wouldn't make sense

SARAH: Yeah. You can't have 3/4 of a soul. 

KAYLA: No. So I don't -- 

SARAH: Except I do! My mom's a ginger, but my dad's not

KAYLA: Okay.

SARAH: No, that means I have half a soul. If I were to have children they would have 3/4 of a soul. I'm not good at math. 

KAYLA: Okay. Now I have a quote from Megan Fox about Machine Gun Kelly

SARAH: Megan Fox! Oh jeez!

KAYLA: This is from a Bustle article. "I knew right away that he is what I call a twin flame. Instead of a soulmate a twin flame is actually where a soul has ascended into a high enough level that it can be split into two different bodies at the same time. So we're actually two halves of the same soul I think, and I said that to him almost immediately because I felt it right away" so. A soulmate, according to this other person, a celestial and mental energy healer "a soulmate is someone who complements us whereas a twin flame is someone who has a deep similarity to us". So it's like the opposites attract kind of thing

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: For a soulmate. Which I feel like -- I don't know. I feel like that's why twin flames are more often talked about in a friendship sense. 

SARAH: Yeah. 

KAYLA: Because you have friends that are really similar to you, then you're supposed to have a partner that's kind of opposite from you for some reason?

SARAH: Yeah the thinking is if you're friends you want to have those similarities, but for your partnership if you're 

(35:00) 

SARAH: both too much the same then you'll just... it'll just get toxic because you'll just both be the same. I don't know. 

KAYLA: I will say, this Bustle article, they're not making soulmates out to be purely a romantic thing. 

SARAH: That's good

KAYLA: This person Michelle Fedrizzi was a Reiki healer says that "a soulmate is someone that comes into your life to teach, push, transcend you into a higher state of consciousness and being. They can enter your life through friends or family and usually help to fulfill a passion or a desire." and they also said that "soulmate relationships are neither good or bad" so that's nice

SARAH: That is really fascinating to me that they said through friends or family because I had never thought of soulmates in the context of blood relations before

KAYLA: No, I hadn't either. It almost seems like weird

SARAH: Yeah because we associate it so much with being this romantic/sexual thing

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: That if someone says "oh they're my soulmate and they're related to me by blood" you're like "oh that's weird," but it's not

KAYLA: No, yeah. It's just our thing. 

SARAH: Kayla, I have a crucial question for you. 

KAYLA: Yeah?

SARAH: Are we twin flames or soulmates?

KAYLA: I do not think we are twin flames. I think we are soulmates

SARAH: That's why our book works

KAYLA: Right. Think of how we do all of our business dealings, you know what I mean?

SARAH: Yeah. Yeah. 

KAYLA: Wait it even said in this article. Hold on, let me find... "think of a soulmate as a business partnership where one person is a dreamer and the other person is really good at taking those ideas and turning them into tangible strategies"

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: I mean...

SARAH: How would you describe our business relationship? I am not a dreamer nor do I have any tangible means of achieving things. 

KAYLA: I would not say you're so much a dreamer as a spitter. 

SARAH: (laughing) Hello?

KAYLA: You just spit things

SARAH: (laughing) I spit things?

KAYLA: And I collect them and I organize them for you

SARAH: You collect my spit in a jar.

KAYLA: I would say that you are the spit to my DNA test. 

(laughter)

SARAH: You know, you have to give so much spit for those.

KAYLA: Yeah, and do you know how much you just say things at me? No, okay. This actually works a lot. Because you just spit things at me, and I take them and collect them and I analyze them, and then I present them to you in an organized fashion. 

SARAH: That's true. And then I spit on them again.

KAYLA: Yes, exactly. 

SARAH: I bite my thumb at you, sir

KAYLA: I think I'm on to something

SARAH: So you're the spit wrangler

KAYLA: Yeah. I'm the 23andme

SARAH: (laughing) Well. No dreams only spit. 

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: Well on that note

(laughter)

KAYLA: This is going to turn into another "I struggle to see this as a job and not a mental illness" I can just see it. 

SARAH: (laughing) What do you mean?

KAYLA: (laughing) I can just see it

SARAH: But I was the one who said that's a job

KAYLA: No, you were saying that you wanted a job

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: As a florist in someone's fever dream 

SARAH: In someone's fanfiction!

KAYLA: Okay, same difference. And I said I struggled to see that as a job and not a mental illness. 

SARAH: Yeah. What does that have to do with this? I'm confused. You need to spit back at me.

KAYLA: I just think this is going to be another thing that people keep copying and pasting into the discord, that's all. 

SARAH: Weasel!

KAYLA: Oh no. 

SARAH: Do people copy and paste that into the discord? I don't spend a lot of time in the discord

KAYLA: They did like twice today. Just today

SARAH: Really?

KAYLA: Yes. 

SARAH: Wow. I'm like a non-holy and probably horrible god in the discord. Probably like a Satan figure, actually

KAYLA: Mm. Mhm

SARAH: Like no one respects me, but I have

KAYLA: No

SARAH: But for some reason it's my discord, but I'm never there. 

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: And everyone is just like "who's this bitch"

KAYLA: yeah, probably. 

SARAH: I don't know if there's a biblical figure that that aligns with, but that's me. 

KAYLA: Uh, yeah. I'll have to look into that. 

SARAH: Yeah. I don't mean to say that I am a god because I am not. Are you kidding?

KAYLA: You did say that

SARAH: (laughing) Would a god be like this?

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: Actually I did write a script...

(40:00) 

SARAH: they become a god, they weren't a god originally. Anyway

KAYLA: Okay

SARAH: I should rewrite that script. It was pretty good. 

KAYLA: Okay. 

SARAH: Anyway. What's our poll for this week?

KAYLA: Is Sarah a god?

SARAH: (laughing) No or no?

KAYLA: No or no. Do you believe in a soulmate? That's what I want to know

SARAH: Yeah. I don't. I think it's buffoonery. 

KAYLA: If soulmates were not seen as an exclusive you can only have one thing, I think I would believe in it

SARAH: That's just a person that you have a really good connection with

KAYLA: Yeah. I believe in friendship is what I just said

SARAH: I believe in friendship.

KAYLA: Yeah

SARAH: I do believe in friendship. I do! I do!

KAYLA: Okay.

SARAH: Impeccable film. 2003 Peter Pan.

KAYLA: Chef's kiss

SARAH: Chef's kiss

KAYLA: What a good looking gentleman

SARAH: Did I have a crush on him? or did I want to be him? Mm, probably wanted to be him

KAYLA: You never know. We may never know. 

SARAH: Anyway. Okay. Do you believe in soulmates?

KAYLA: Mhm

SARAH: y/n. That is yes or no, not your name. Kayla, what is your beef and your juice this week?

KAYLA: My beef is that I have to move next week

SARAH: Oof

KAYLA: And I hate moving

SARAH: Who doesn't?

KAYLA: And I am not prepared for this move

SARAH: Rip

KAYLA: So next week's episode, who's to say, you know what I mean?

SARAH: Anything can happen

KAYLA: I feel like it's going to be another "I'm recording from my closet because I just moved" situation

SARAH: Plato's?

KAYLA: No, shut up. My juice is that this weekend --

SARAH: Do you think Plato was gay? Is that why he had a closet? Because he was in it?

KAYLA: I mean the Greeks were known for being

SARAH: So true

KAYLA: Pretty homoerotic

SARAH: Gay as fuck. For anyone who's like "what the fuck is going on?" Plato's Closet is a store in the United States where you bring your unwanted clothes and you sell them to them, but they give you like one cent for them and then they sell them. It's like a thrift store but instead of donating you get like 2 cents. 

KAYLA: Yes

SARAH: For giving your stuff. That's all

(laughter)

KAYLA: That's the bad joke Sarah has been making

SARAH: That's the joke. Anyway, your beef and your juice.

KAYLA: Yeah that was my beef. My juice is that over the weekend, we randomly found that there was this street in Boston shut down, I guess they do it every Sunday, the street is called Newbury St, I forget what the thing is called, but they shut it down. Anyway, we decided to walk down it, and there was this booth of people just giving out free weed?

SARAH: Hm

KAYLA: So we got like $50 worth of free weed just handed to us

SARAH: Has it killed you yet?

KAYLA: Not loose weed it was like edibles. 

SARAH: Are they regulated edibles?

KAYLA: Yes it's from like a real company they were just promoting themselves. So that was cool. 

SARAH: They said "hey want to get fucked up?" This is what the suburban white parents were afraid of

KAYLA: It literally is. This is the city lifestyle

SARAH: People offering drugs in the form of candy to their children for free on the street

KAYLA: True. It was just so weird because we thought they were selling it so we were like "oh let's go look at it" then the lady she gave us her sales pitch and we were like, okay. And she was like "in exchange for your time, here take a sample" and we were like "okay" just expecting a gummy. 

SARAH: yeah

KAYLA: No, just like $50 worth of weed. So that was cool. 

SARAH: How much is $50 worth of weed? I don't have any conception of how much that is. 

KAYLA: I mean I guess I don't know the actual price but it was like one full canister of edibles and one full weed chocolate bar.

SARAH: Hm.

KAYLA: So things that could last a person months

SARAH: Wow.

KAYLA: Anyway, legalize it. And stop incarcerating people

SARAH: Yeah

KAYLA: For it. If you're going to give it out on the street. 

SARAH: That has brought up a beef that I wasn't originally going to say, but it has come to me, is that today -- yesterday, Gavin Newsom, the governor of California vetoed a bill that was on his desk, so it passed all the necessary places, and then he vetoed it, because it was basically it would have established safe injection sites in LA, San Francisco, and Oakland, and he was like "but more people but drugs, but the war on drugs" even though there is literally so much evidence that safe injections do help reduce drug use and it reduces the people who die from overdoses by like a fucking lot, but he was like "no". That's my beef. My other beef is... no, it's too dark. I'm not going to say it. That's my beef. 

KAYLA: Oh-kay?

SARAH: (laughing) My juice. Listen, I was in a dark place about an hour and a half ago. My juice is fried chicken, I think it's nice. You can tell us about your beef, your juice, your thoughts on soulmates on our social media @soundsfakepod. We also have a Patreon if you would like to support us that way, patreon.com/soundsfakepod. We have 2 new $2 patrons. They are Katrina K and Matthew Stark. Thank you to both of you. You're delightful. 

KAYLA: Thank you. Welcome! Thank you.

SARAH: Thank you! Welcome. Wel - way - no. I was going to combine them and it was going to be wank you, and that's not our brand. Send help. Oh she's just ignoring me now.

KAYLA: I'm really tired. I was just hoping if I didn't encourage you, you would just get back to doing the patrons. 

SARAH: Our $5 patrons who we are promoting this week are George Ankers, Green_sarah, H. Valdis, Hadas Drukker, and Jackie Rubashkin. Our $10 patrons who are promoting something this week are Barefoot Backpacker who would like to promote their podcast, Travel Tales from Beyond the Brochure, The Steve who would like to promote Ecosia, a search engine for the trees, and Zirklteo who would like to promote England not being real. Our other $10 patrons are Arcnes, Ari K, Benjamin Ybarra, Changeling and Alex the ace cat, David Jay, David Nurse, Derek and Carissa, CinnamonToastPunch, my Aunt Jeannie, Maggie Capalbo, Martin Chiesl, Mattie, Potater, Purple Hayes, and Rosie Costello. Our $15 patrons are Andrew Hillum who would like to promote The Invisible Spectrum Podcast, Click4Caroline who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, Dia Chappell who would like to promote Twitch.tv/MelodyDia, Hector Murillo who would like to promote friends that are supportive, constructive, and help you grow as a better person, Keziah Root who would like to promote the people who come into your life just for a small time, but just when you need them. Smiley face, heart. Sounds like the opposite of a soul mate, but like good, you know?

KAYLA: So true.

SARAH: So true, bestie. Nathaniel White who would like to promote NathanielJWhiteDesigns.com, Kayla's Aunt Nina who would like to promote @katemaggart.art, and Sara Jones who is @eternalloli everywhere. Our $20 patrons are Sabrina Hauck, Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. And Dragonfly who would like to promote this image of a cherry coke can I saw from the 90s. Thanks for listening. Oh, also book. Soundsfakepod.com/book

KAYLA: Buy it!

SARAH: That is where you can pre-order the book. 

KAYLA: Give us your money

SARAH: If you're like "I don't have the means to support you consistently on Patreon" a good way to support us just once is buying the book. 

KAYLA: And if you don't have those means, you can just share it

SARAH: Yeah.

KAYLA: Pre-ordering matters a lot for the success of books. 

SARAH: Tell your friends. Blow us a kiss. 

(kissing sounds and laughter)

SARAH: Thanks for listening, tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears. 

KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your cows and give them a little kiss. 

(kissing sounds)

(48:54) 

Sounds Fake But Okay