Ep 27: Sexual Games pt. 2
SARAH: Hey what’s up hello. Welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aro-ace girl (I’m Sarah. That’s me.)
KAYLA: And me Kayla, a demi straight girl.
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else that we just don’t understand.
KAYLA: On today’s episode: Episodes Part 2
BOTH: — Sounds fake, but okay.
*Intro music*
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod.
KAYLA: We are recording this right after recording, immediately after –
SARAH: The last one.
KAYLA: So also Miranda is still here laying on the floor with us, and will probably insert random comments.
SARAH: If you hear random Miranda comments, or random cat comments, that’s Miranda.
ALL: (laugh)
KAYLA: So last time, like two minutes ago –
SARAH: But last week for you.
KAYLA: We played Episode 1 of The Bad Boy Stole my Bra, and I personally was riveted. I don’t know, you guys might hate this and not want this at all.
SARAH: But we’re living for it.
KAYLA: Sucks, you’re not paying us enough to not do it. If you want to dictate what episodes we do, pay us motherfucker.
SARAH: True. Also as always promised, we’re going to do your episode.
KAYLA: We're trying.
SARAH: We're on it. But yeah, for those of you who weren't around last week, you might want to listen to last week's episode to put this in context.
KAYLA: It won’t make any sense to you.
SARAH: We were playing this game on the app Episodes where –
KAYLA: It's like a Choose Your Own Adventure –
SARAH: It’s like a Choose Your Own Adventure/Sims sort of game, but it's just weirdly sexual.
KAYLA: Yeah, you're living for it.
SARAH: So that's where we're at. Alright, so we're on to Part 2.
KAYLA: Yeah, so the cliffhanger was, Alec put our bras in the tree and was like, what are you going to do about it? I personally was like, have sex with you? But that's not what Ashleigh with an ‘iegh’ said.
SARAH: No.
KAYLA: Our story is loading.
SARAH: What did she say?
KAYLA: I don't think she said anything.
SARAH: Okay, that was the cliffhanger.
KAYLA: We can earn gems when you read stories with the 3 in the corner.
SARAH: I don’t care.
KAYLA: (gasps) We earned a gem, we can buy clothes next time.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Oh, and we're loading again.
SARAH: We're still loading.
KAYLA: Are we still, oh. Zoom in to window – Oh, the next night? Oh, we’re stomping around.
MIRANDA: We’re already in the next night? What happened to the day?
SARAH: We just took all of the bras and underwear out of the tree?
KAYLA: I guess we'll see. Violet.
SARAH: What do her parents think of this?
MIRANDA: I feel like they're not home.
KAYLA: Okay anyway.
SARAH: It’s what happens when you have absent parents.
KAYLA: Violet, “Wow, can any more people share Alec’s posts? Your tree undies have 1000 likes”. That's savage.
SARAH: That’s a decent number of likes.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “All I heard at school today were dumb jokes like ‘Hey, Ashleigh, keep it brief’”.
SARAH: Ha ha ha.
KAYLA: “Oh, look here's another text. ‘Is there a sale on your undies? Because I'd like them 100% off’”. Violet, “That's actually pretty funny”. Ashleigh, “I've been getting these all day. I could kill Alec”. Violet, “Come on, it was a pretty good prank”.
SARAH: She could kill Alec, kinky.
KAYLA: Ashleigh “Seriously, a good prank?”. Okay, we can either say “Okay, it was kind of funny” or “No way”.
SARAH: I'm saying personally, no way.
KAYLA: But like, should –
SARAH: For the purpose of the plot, we’re going to say it was kind of funny.
KAYLA: “Yeah, Alec totally got me, but I’m still super pissed at him. And the angrier I get, the harder Alex laughs. Just like he did last night. He’s so going to get it when he falls asleep tonight.” Oh.
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: Okay. Violet “You think you can actually pull this off?” Ashleigh, “I'll sneak in, make the switch and sneak right back”. Violet, “What if he doesn't shower in the morning?”
SARAH: How is she going to get in his house?
KAYLA: This doesn't make any sense.
MIRANDA: Probably the same way he’s been getting into her house.
SARAH: Which is?
MIRANDA: Apparating.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Have you passed him in the hall? He smells like coconut and warm ocean breezes”.
SARAH: Warm? How does a smell smell warm?
KAYLA: Stop it. Violet, “Good thing to know you're not interested in him”. Ashleigh, “I'm just saying, he definitely showers”. Not same. “And when he does, his hair…”. Violet, “You sure you want to do this?” Ashleigh, “He deserves it. Did you see that tree last night?”
SARAH: Okay, if Violet is questioning something, I think it's probably a bad idea. Violet doesn't have the best of ideas.
KAYLA: Violet, “Look on the bright side. Last night, the most popular guy” – That's not, they spelled popular wrong.
SARAH: Oh good.
KAYLA: “The most popular guy in school wanted to walk you home”. Ashleigh, “Yes, Dylan is boy perfection”. Okay, we can either say, “Though he's not my type”, “And I'd like to lick him all over” or “But let's talk about something else”. He's not our type, because our type is Alec.
SARAH: Yeah, he’s not our type.
KAYLA: Because Chase’s type is Dylan.
SARAH: Unfortunately, we're going to have to avoid the really sexual answer, so that Dylan and Chase can get together.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “He's completely wrong for me”. Violet, “You say that about everyone”. Ashleigh, “I'm not interested in going out with Dylan Merrick”. Violet, “You're not interested in bad boys, cheaters or players. Dylan is the nicest guy in school”. Ashleigh, “I thought Toby was a nice guy too”. Oh, we have a name.
SARAH: Toby.
KAYLA: Violet, “I know you did, but…” Ashleigh, “Look, Alec’s light is out”. Ashleigh, “Revenge is moments away”.
SARAH: Oh man.
KAYLA: Violet, “You are not going over to Alex’s house like that”. Ashleigh, “Like what?” Violet, “Dressed like my grandma on a snow day”. Ashleigh, “Who cares how I'm dressed?” Violet, “What if Alex wakes up? He’ll Insta you looking like that, and your social status will tank”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: As if it hasn't already.
SARAH: This is not how high school is.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “I'll be super quiet”. Violet, “After the underwear drama you cannot risk being a social media spectacle again. Try on the outfit I found in the tornado you call a closet”. Oh, we're changing. Oh, Violet, just a second.
SARAH: Can we pay for it now, with our diamonds?
KAYLA: Oh my –
SARAH: Oh my God. Wait, holy shit, can I look at this?
KAYLA: Oh my gosh, she looks like Catwoman.
SARAH: She looks like, she's wearing like pleather pants with a bandana tied around her thigh, and a shirt that has a V down past her belly button, and then a black bra. It's like, a look.
KAYLA: But it looks like a stripper.
SARAH: It does not scream her personality. But Violet thinks she's ready for a break-in.
KAYLA: But also my thing is, Violet was like oh, I just found this in your closet. So you're telling me Ashleigh just had these items of clothing?
SARAH: I think they would be in Violet’s closet.
KAYLA: “And prepped in case that sleeping hunk of manliness wakes you”. Oh man, we need 20 diamonds to buy it.
SARAH: We only have one.
KAYLA: Guess we're going in our PJs.
SARAH: Oh man.
KAYLA: “I want to be comfortable when I take down Alec” and she runs away. “Wish me luck Vi. Operation Humiliate the Bad Boy is now underway”. Okay, I don't know how we got there, but suddenly we're just in his room. A little while later. Ashleigh, “That'll teach Sexy Von Shallow not to mess with me. Just wait until he shows up at school tomorrow. Mission accomplished, Vi. Luckily, I remembered my way around his room from when I got my bra back”. We're just staring at him sleep.
SARAH: Wait, so she got [her] bra back at his house? I really thought it was her house.
KAYLA: I guess not. Violet, “I see you Ashleigh, you're checking out the sleeping hottie”. Oh, they’re texting right now.
KAYLA: What she is doing?
SARAH: Why is she loitering in his room?
KAYLA: Oh, she just tripped on his bed.
SARAH: Oh, no.
KAYLA: Oh, we're in bed with him and he just woke up. Alec “What the hell? Did we get drunk and sleep together?” Ashleigh, “He's awake, what do I say?”. “Are you out of your mind? Of course we did, big boy”, or “This is all a dream”.
SARAH: Of course we did, big boy. (laughs) Well dang, double daddy.
KAYLA: She says “Oh why yes, I'm hurt you don't remember”. Alec “You were trying to prank me back, weren't you Ashleigh?” Damn, how did he not buy that? “A for effort”. God, he’s so attractive. Alec, “Nice outfit by the way”.
SARAH: Oh my God Kayla, are you okay?
KAYLA: We just made him really hot.
SARAH: Is this your type?
KAYLA: No, not even really.
MIRANDA: It's not real.
KAYLA: Damn it, I totally thought this was real.
SARAH: Well dang, double daddy.
KAYLA: We were all attracted to Aladdin, okay?
MIRANDA: Yeah, you're right.
SARAH: Also, wait, what's his face? Shang?
MIRANDA: Yeah, what a guy.
SARAH: What a dude.
KAYLA: Alec, “Everyone needs to see this”. Oh no, he just took a picture of us in our pajamas.
SARAH: Okay, listen high schoolers, calm down.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “You wouldn't dare post that!”. Alec, “Have you met me?”. Oh, he just posted it. “Girl Next Door snuck into my room in PJs”. Okay, well he’s still going to use the shampoo we put in the shower. Alec, “Can you blame her?” Oh, no. “You are the worst, Alec Ryder”. “Actually, I'm the best… at getting revenge. Never mess with the master, Ashleigh”. Ashleigh, “Yuck fou Alec, yuck –“ Oh, she just ran out of the room. That was weird. Oh, she fell. She just keeps tripping on her pajamas.
MIRANDA: Why are her pajamas so big?
KAYLA: Alec, “Huh, nice landing”. And he winked. This is a disaster. But he still might dye his hair whatever it is. We did. We're back at school.
SARAH: I'm assuming it was a hair dye situation.
KAYLA: Justin, some random dude. “Hey Ashleigh, have fun in your PJs in Alec’s room last night?” Sydney, “#lockyourwindows #stalkergirl”. Oh, they're laughing at us.
SARAH: Yeah, but like also, that is weird.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Whatever”. Violet, “How come you're not attacking? I thought you'd be majorly angry”. Ashleigh, “I am, but I'll have the last laugh. Wait and see. As long as pretty boy took his morning shower, he’ll look like a fool. No more bad boy, only sad boy”.
SARAH: You know what I think is going to happen? A prediction –
KAYLA: Justin, “Whoa Alec. Dude, your hair.”
SARAH: Can I make my prediction?
KAYLA: Fine.
SARAH: She's going to have dyed his hair, but people are going to like it, and it's going to be hot.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “It worked Violet. Alec used the shampoo. Victory is so very sweet”. Oh, he has pink hair. Nate, “It's amazing. Way to make a statement”. “Intensely hot, Alec”. Oh, a girl named Kayla said that.
(10:00)
SARAH: Okay, but hold on, please hold.
KAYLA: I don't like it.
SARAH: His hair is really bright pink. He had dark hair, did she put bleach in there?
KAYLA: That's not how it works. You couldn't put bleach and dye.
SARAH: Yeah, you have to bleach it first.
KAYLA: Unrealistic. Oh, everyone thinks he's hot. Oh no.
SARAH: Yeah, my prediction was correct.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “What? They actually like it?” Alec, “Thanks for the makeover, Ashleigh. I think people are digging it”. Ashleigh, “But I – “. Alec, “Never try to outprank the prankster”.
SARAH: Just fuck already.
KAYLA: “You’ll get your ass handed to you every time”. He could hand us our ass.
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: Ashleigh, we either punch it, ignore it or kiss it. See, I'd say kiss it, but we can't just like kiss him right now, can we?
SARAH: Let's try it.
KAYLA: Alright. Oh, we just kissed him and it says “Alec will remember this”. “So there, showed him”.
SARAH: Oh my God, you showed nothing.
KAYLA: Violet, “What exactly did you show him?” Alec, “You didn't have to sneak hair dye in my shampoo as an excuse to climb into bed with me”. He just whispered that to us.
SARAH: He did.
KAYLA: It's pretty hot.
SARAH: But like, how would that be an excuse to climb in – Oh, I understand, she tripped.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “What?” Alec, “Next time just ask. I'm always up for a dance in the sheets”.
SARAH: Fuck, fuck, fuck.
KAYLA: “Even if you do drool”. How does he know if we drool? Oh, he was in our –
SARAH: “Excuse me?”
KAYLA: Alec, “She's a really hard sleeper. I visited you last night Ashleigh – “
SARAH: What the fuck?
KAYLA: “Got some great pics”. Oh my God, oh my God. “I'll post them later”. This is disgustingly creepy. Ashleigh, “That - he - him.” Violet, “Use your words, Ashleigh”. Ashleigh, “That crumbly piece of shitzu on a cracker”.
ALL: (laugh)
KAYLA: Why did he come into our room at night?
SARAH: That’s really creepy.
KAYLA: That’s so fucking creepy.
SARAH: Like, for no reason. Not even for revenge.
KAYLA: I’m really regretting not liking Dylan.
SARAH: Yeah, we should have but like, Dylan and Chase.
KAYLA: Oh, Dylan came up to us, we're in a coffee shop or something. “Hey, Ashleigh what's up?” Ashleigh, “Aren't you afraid to be seen with Alec’s crazy stalker?” Dylan, “Nah”, and he laughs. “But you could choose someone better to stalk. Maybe a football player or class president”. Oh, he wants us to stalk him. How saucy, he wants the V. Ashleigh, “Very funny”. Oh, and now Tianna is here. “So desperate you crawled in his window? Didn't you learn your lesson last summer?”
SARAH: Okay, here's my question. Okay, here's my question –
MIRANDA: Here it is.
SARAH: So everyone's all like, judging her for going into his room. He's been in her room twice.
KAYLA: Double standards.
SARAH: I know.
KAYLA: They're real.
SARAH: Anyway. What did Dove Cameron say?
KAYLA: She was like, didn't you learn your lesson last summer? We can either, “I've got to let her know”, “I should just ignore her”, “I should be the better person”. What are we letting her know?
SARAH: I don't know.
KAYLA: I'd like to let her know. We’ll let her know. “I'd give you an evil look, but you've already got one”. Good one. Oh, that made her mad, I guess.
SARAH: Was that just our comeback?
KAYLA: Yeah, I guess so.
SARAH: That’s a horrible comeback. “I hate being the top story on everyone's feed”. Dylan, “I can fix that”. Ashleigh, “It would take an act of God to change that”. Dylan, “Well, I'm not a god but – “ He just stood up on the table, and he took off his shirt and he's dancing around. Ashleigh, “What are you doing?” Dylan, “Not sure”.
SARAH: (laughs) Dancing on the table, not sure what you're doing. I'm having flashbacks to 10 Things I Hate About You when she gets really drunk and gets on the table.
KAYLA: Dylan, “But I bet you're not the top trending story now, are you?” Wow, we should like Dylan. He's so nice.
SARAH: Yeah, but I just ship him with Chase.
KAYLA: I know, but he’s so nice to us. Ashleigh, “I guess not. Thanks, Dylan”. She's clapping. Good clap, Ashleigh. Oh, he jumped off the table. “At your service”. Oh, why is he so sweet?
SARAH: I know. Ashleigh, “Now, can you help me get back at Alec? He's got more photos of me, and he's making my life total heck”.
SARAH: Total heck.
KAYLA: Dylan, “Sometimes when you rely too much on plans, you miss what's right in front of you. You know?”
SARAH: Oh my God. Dylan, you're missing Chase.
KAYLA: “What's he getting at?”. “Is he flirting with me?”, “Maybe I should listen to him”, [or] “I want his help destroying Alec”.
SARAH: I want his help destroying Alec.
KAYLA: I'm so conflicted, he's so nice. But I chose what you've told me.
SARAH: But Chase –
KAYLA: I know. (groans)
SARAH: I stand by Dylan and Chase, I understand that it's not going to be canon, however, I stand by it.
KAYLA: This is painful. Alright, Ashleigh, “If I don't have a good plan, I won't be able to destroy Alec. That's all I care about right now”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Poor Dylan, we’re just stringing this dick along. Alec, “Later dude, I've got to get this stuff out of my hair before I hit the pool. Drool pics coming soon, Ashleigh”. Oh, he laughed at us. That dick. “I just had an idea, Dylan”. Dylan still has no shirt on. “Sorry, gotta run. Thanks for everything”, and we run away. Dylan looks sad, I feel bad for him.
MIRANDA: You just left him alone, shirtless, in a restaurant.
KAYLA: Violet “Put itching powder in Alec’s underwear while he's in the pool? Perfect scheme, Ashleigh”. Ashleigh, “Otherwise known as the screaming weenie”.
SARAH: But hold on. What is itching powder?
KAYLA: Non-existent, I don't think?
SARAH: All right cool.
KAYLA: “One evil underwear prank deserves another”. Violet, “Maybe you are hard ass. I'm so impressed” Good grammar. Ashleigh, “I only have 15 minutes before the guys come back to change”. Why does she know that?
SARAH: I don’t know.
KAYLA: Violet, “I'll stay on guard and text you as soon as I see someone coming. Nothing will distract me from my duty to serve and protect Ashleigh, my personal prankster hero”. Except for someone with letter J, I'm assuming.
SARAH: J, well did she get her J? I feel like she probably did.
KAYLA: Well, they walked home together though.
SARAH: Oh, right. I guess it was a quickie.
KAYLA: You're right, Ashleigh, “You're the best, Vi”. I don't trust Violet at all.
SARAH: No, but like – I don't know. We're moving forward.
KAYLA: We're sneaking into the locker room.
SARAH: Move your hand.
KAYLA: I'm sorry
SARAH: Your hand gets in the way of the screen.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Ugh, it reeks like zombie BO in here. Boys are gross”. Good one, Ashleigh, they are gross. We’re standing around, looking at some lockers. We walk up to a locker, we open a locker, we stand around some more.
SARAH: It’s not going to be his, it’s going to be someone else’s.
KAYLA: It’s going to be Dylan’s.
SARAH: Oh no.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Okay underwear, where are you? Alec’s phone? This is even better than underwear. I can delete my drool pics. And maybe I can even find an embarrassing pic of Alec’s to post. Wait, Dylan's texting Alec about me. This is so tempting”. Oh no, we need 20 diamonds –
SARAH: We don’t have the diamonds. What does it say?
KAYLA: We need 20 diamonds to delete the pictures and post payback. But we’re poor, so we'll just let them post the pictures. “Time to get back to Operation Itchy Weenie”. Oh no. Someone has walked in, we look –
SARAH: We look suspicious.
KAYLA: “Holy shin splints, they’re back”. Oh, no. We ran away, we're in a bathroom stall. They're back. Backstreet’s back, alright.
SARAH: (sings) Backstreet’s back, alright.
KAYLA: Alec, “Dude, did your mom buy those shorts for you?” We're talking to some guy. Oh, and we just took our pants off. Nate, “On sale, a-hole”. Oh, wow, everyone's naked. Oh, now they're going to think we came in here to look at them naked again.
SARAH: Oh, no,
KAYLA: There's a lot of naked man. Oh, no. Violet, “I got distracted by my letter K”.
MIRANDA: She did get the J.
KAYLA: “Oh, I knew Kevin Powers is a really good kisser”. Now all the guys are walking around.
SARAH: They’re all walking around naked. Is Chase around?
MIRANDA: What did Chase look like again?
KAYLA: Like, reddish hair.
SARAH: I don't think he’s there.
KAYLA: Violet, “The guys are coming into the locker room”. Ashleigh, “Be quiet, stupid phone”. Alec “Hold up. Is someone in here?” I don't see Chase. (gasps) Oh no. To be continued?
SARAH: Right.
KAYLA: Wait, I hope we have enough – Oh, we got one more diamond, only need 18 more to buy things.
SARAH: Incredible.
KAYLA: Alright. We're on to episode three. They are knocking on the bathroom, we just came out – For some reason, we just came out of the stall when they knocked, instead of hiding.
SARAH: Why didn't she just shut the stall door? Or like, climb out a window or something?
KAYLA: She could have just stood on the toilet seat so you can’t see her feet.
SARAH: I know. It could have been---
KAYLA: They are literally, they opened the door and are just standing there naked. No shame. I mean, I guess they're hot, but –
ALL: (laugh) Mmm. Men.
KAYLA: Alec, “Well look who it is, my stalker. Come to get another look?” Honestly?
SARAH: Why – Her reaction, she literally just keeps putting her hands to her face.
KAYLA: Nate, “You must be totally into Alec. Stop stalking – Stall stalking is no joke” Well neither is him coming into my room.
SARAH: I don’t understand. Double standards here are ridiculous.
KAYLA: Justin, “Are you obsessed with him or what?”. Alec, “So Ashleigh, is this too hot for you?” I mean, there's three guys just naked.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Oh, they're laughing at me. Ashleigh, “What do I say?”. “Hot? I'd say not”, “You know it boys!” [or] “What the freakin’ frack?”
SARAH: What the hell are we going to achieve by saying “What the freaking frack?”.
KAYLA: What do we say? “Hot? I'd say not”?
SARAH: We're going to say “Hot? I'd say not”.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: I'm mad.
KAYLA: Oh, okay. “The stench of BO in here could actually kill someone”. Good one, Ashleigh. “Well, it's been real”. Alec, “Why the hurry? You've got more locker rooms to scope out?”. Ashleigh, “Out of my way or I'll – “. Alec, “You’ll what?” Okay, we’ll “Totally pitch a fit”, “Break down and cry”, “Haul off and smack you”. Can we smack him?
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: Kinky. “I'll slap you silly”. Oh God Ashleigh, you're such a limp noodle. Oh, we slapped him.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Dylan, “Ashleigh, what are you doing in here?”
MIRANDA: At least Dylan has a towel.
SARAH: Dylan’s not naked.
KAYLA: Good. Ashleigh, “Isn't it obvious?”. “I took a wrong turn”, “I'm enjoying a sausage fest” [or[ “I want equal rights”.
SARAH: (laughs) Can we say “I want equal rights”?
KAYLA: Yeah, I want equal rights. “I don't believe in separate locker rooms for girls and guys”. Ashleigh, what? “Now if you'll excuse me”, she walks away Dylan, “Hey, give me a sec. I'll meet you in the hall, okay?”. Does this turn him on or something?
(20:00)
SARAH: I don’t know.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Sure”. Dylan is giving us every chance and we're just not taking it
SARAH: Dylan and Chase forever. Dase.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Thank goodness, fresh air again”.
SARAH: Chillin’.
KAYLA: Chillin’
ALL: (laugh)
KAYLA: Dylan, “It was a little intense in there. Though you did totally kick ass”. Ashleigh, “They got back sooner than I expected”. Dylan, “Don't you think it might be time to stop with revenge plots?”. Ashleigh, “And let Alec win?” Dylan, “I hate to say it, but you may actually be getting a little stalkery”.
SARAH: Oh my God, and Alec’s not? I want to die.”
KAYLA: “Me, stalkery?” We either say, “Don't you mean badassery?” or “Maybe I am going a tad nuts”.
MIRANDA: Badassery.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Thanks Miranda.
MIRANDA: You’re welcome.
KAYLA: “I'm standing up for myself. Alec’s the one who stole my bra”. Dylan, “Okay, I just meant…“. Ashleigh, “He deserves it. He's the most annoying being on the planet. I hate him”.
SARAH: Sexy.
ALL: (laugh)
KAYLA: Dylan, “For someone you hate, you should spend a lot of time talking about him”. Yeah, get the picture, Dylan. Do you not pick up on our hints? “Maybe it's not hate”. Ashleigh, “What the focca - ?” What?
SARAH: Foccacia?
KAYLA “What the focaccia, Dylan? I am not interested in Alec Ryder”. We are though.
SARAH: Oh my God, you totally are.
KAYLA: Dylan “Then prove it”. Ashleigh, “How?”. Dylan, “Go on a date with me. I'll show you why Alec is absolutely the wrong guy for you”.
SARAH: That’s not a good way –
KAYLA: We know he’s the wrong guy for you.
SARAH: That’s not a good way to get someone to go on a date with you.
KAYLA: Oh, wait. It'll take us 20 coins to go on a date with him anyway – Oh, “Go on a date with Dylan and get the dirt on Alec”. So we would get dirt on him, but we are poor, so –
SARAH: We’re poor.
KAYLA: We’re hightailing out of there. “No can do, I've got to study”. And she literally ran away.
SARAH: Incredible.
KAYLA: Got a jet. What if this doesn't finish in three episodes and we're just left with a cliffhanger? I'd be so mad.
SARAH: We’re right at the end.
KAYLA: Oh. Violet, “Dylan Merrick rescued you and you turn him down for a date? Are you mad?”
SARAH: Yeah.
MIRANDA: Yeah, this is definitely not an American person.
SARAH: She’s mad.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Of course I turned him down. I like him, but not in that way”. Yeah, we don't like him that way. “Dylan's a friend, nothing more”. Violet, “When are you going to stop torturing yourself and have some fun?”. Ashleigh, “I know you're right, but after everything went down with Toby”.
KAYLA: When will we finally get a backstory?
SARAH: Never.
KAYLA: Violet, “And Kaitlyn” Was that her letter K?
SARAH: No.
KAYLA: Who’s Kaitlyn?
SARAH: Isn’t that her sister?
KAYLA: (gasps) Did her sister cheat on –
SARAH: Then okay but If –
MIRANDA: Why does she stop swearing for her sister?
SARAH: I don't – I'm confused.
KAYLA: I want a backstory. Ashleigh, “It's been a year and I still miss her so much”. (gasps) She died?
SARAH: Oh, no.
KAYLA: Ooh, backstory. Sydney “Heard about you lurking in the boys’ locker room, Ashleigh”. We're having – Why is everyone ruining our backstory? “Alec says you must really want him bad”.
MIRANDA: We do.
KAYLA: Ashleigh “That clock pucker. I need to teach him a lesson”.
SARAH: What? Wait, what is that supposed to be?
KAYLA: Motherfucker?
SARAH: I guess.
KAYLA: A clock pucker, I don’t know. Ashleigh, “Hey Violet, you know how Alec loves being naked? What if the whole school got to witness that?”. Violet, “Speak for me and the whole school, aka me, that must happen. What are you going to do?”. Ashleigh, “Alec’s a player, right? I'll let him know I'm ready to play”.
SARAH: Haven’t you been doing that?
KAYLA: Yeah. Violet, “Ooh channeling your inner vixen, so fun. We’ll have seventh period school assembly, think you can pull it off by then?”
MIRANDA: Which school would let –
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Let me go find Alec”. She literally runs out of the classroom.
MIRANDA: Does anyone go to school here, or are we just chasing dick? Everyone’s just in the hallway.
SARAH: Why are they having the assembly? What’s the assembly for?
KAYLA: “Should I approach him?”. “Play it coy” or “Be bold”.
SARAH: Be bold.
KAYLA: All right. We’ll be bold. Oh, we’ve stomped right up to him.
MIRANDA: We’re aggressive stomping.
KAYLA: “Hey Amanda, beat it”.
SARAH: Oh, wow.
KAYLA: “I need to talk to Alec, now”.
SARAH: Okay, that’s bold, not aggressive
KAYLA: Alec says “Sure. Later, Amanda”. Our character sucks. Amanda left. Alec, “What's up? You miss me?” Ashleigh, “Actually, I do. Ever since the locker room, I haven't been able to get you out of my mind”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Alec, “Really? You seem pretty upset before”. Ashleigh, “You caught me by surprise. But now I can't think of anything else”.
SARAH: Your dick.
KAYLA: Alec, “I knew it”. Ashleigh, “Can we get some alone time? I’m tired of fighting – “.
SARAH: With your dick.
KAYLA: Alec, “Want to kiss and makeup? I'm going to come over tonight. Just leave your window open”.
SARAH: (whispers) Dick.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “I can't wait that long. There's an assembly seventh period”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: “No one will be backstage in the auditorium. Meet me there”.
SARAH: What? No.
KAYLA: Alec “Wow, you're really serious”. Really?
SARAH: At least fuck in a bathroom.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Really”.
SARAH: Because listen, backstage of the auditorium – Is the assembly at the auditorium, or was it in the gym?
MIRANDA: It’s in the gym, I'm sure.
SARAH: But if it's at the auditorium, we have a problem.
KAYLA: I'm sure it's in the gym. Alec, “Then I'll see you backstage”. Ashleigh, “And remember, I want to see all of you”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Alec, “I'll be there”. What an idiot.
SARAH: Would you get naked in your high school?
KAYLA: I'm sure people fuck in their – We once caught people, they were fucking in the middle of the baseball field.
SARAH: There was a kid I went to school with who was kind of famous for fucking people in the dugout.
KAYLA: It's not a bad place to do it.
SARAH: Yeah, but still baseball field.
KAYLA: Dirty.
SARAH: Yeah, not baseball field, but baseball.
KAYLA: Yeah. Kind of famous.
S: Yeah.
KAYLA: Violet, “You think he'll show?”. Ashleigh, “He's way too cocky not to”. Violet, “And get naked?”. Ashleigh, “Trust me, that boy loves to flaunt himself in front of me, and when he does, we'll be ready”. Violet, “Just make sure I can see you from your hiding place”.
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: “When you give the signal, I'll pull the curtain”. (gasps) So the assembly is in the auditorium. They're going to get him naked and pull up the curtain? That's literally illegal. Also, he’d probably just like, be okay with it.
SARAH: That's not okay.
KAYLA: Oh, God, this is so – Who wrote this? I need to talk to them. This is obviously a young person that wrote this.
SARAH: I think it was a young person that wrote this.
KAYLA: Violet – Okay, we already read that. Ashleigh, “I can't wait to see his face when the whole assembly sees him”. Violet, “Maybe you shouldn't hide, maybe you should actually meet him. Just make sure he gets naked”. Ashleigh, “Meaning?”. Violet, “Tease those clothes right off his bod”. Ashleigh, “Actually get hot and heavy with Alec? Violet, “Just pretend, it'll guarantee he strips”. Ashleigh, “That's for sure”. Violet, “And I can still pull the curtain when it's time. What do you think?” Oh, this is going to go so badly.
SARAH: I say don't pull the curtain. Just talk.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “Teasing Alec into stripping will be so hot”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Okay, we either seduce Alec and ensure he gets naked in front of the whole school for 20 diamonds, or take the easy way out and hide behind the curtain. Well, guess we have no choice.
SARAH: We don’t have money.
KAYLA: “I think I'll play it safe and hide behind the curtain”. If you want to sponsor us, just to give us money to like, play this game better? Please do. Violet, “Good luck you. Man, I hope we get to see that boy’s biscuits”. We've already seen his biscuits.
SARAH: Is this Violet talking?
KAYLA: Yeah,
SARAH: I think she hasn't seen the biscuits yet.
KAYLA: I doubt they’re that good. The small strip of black it takes to hide these boys’ penises makes it seem like they're literally an inch long.
SARAH: Can’t be that big.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “You said it”.
SARAH: She did.
KAYLA: Okay, Alec’s walking backstage, we're hiding behind the curtain. We're now just seeing curtain. She walks – Oh, he's there. He looks around. Ashleigh, texting “On my way, hope you're naked and waiting”. Oh, she's texting Alec. “Hope you're naked and waiting”. Okay, he looks at his phone. He takes off everything. Literally just strips. Ashleigh, thinking “Nudity achieved”. Ashleigh “Now, Violet”. She pulls the curtain and he's there, naked. We are laughing at his face. Alec, “Whaa…?” And we bow. We bow again, lots of people are taking pictures.
SARAH: There are so many things wrong with this.
KAYLA: He grabs us and kisses us, whilst he's naked. Dylan, “Seriously? They're killing me”. Oh, Dylan my sweet baby boy. “What does he even see in her?”. The jealousy is real.
KAYLA: Principal, “This is not the place to do this today” For another day, but today, this was not the place.
MIRANDA: Maybe next week.
KAYLA: Ashleigh, “What the…” Alec, “Got you good, girl”.
“To be continued. Thanks for reading, this is the trial version for Bad Boy Stole my Bra. Look for the full version soon”. What?
SARAH: Oh no. What do you think is going to happen? Okay, it’s time for some theories.
KAYLA: Oh, no.
SARAH: Okay, first of all.
KAYLA: Oh, no. I’m so sad.
SARAH: First of all, I expect a spinoff about Dylan and Chase. Chase can help Dylan get over Ashleigh.
MIRANDA: He needs to get over her.
KAYLA: I'm so sad.
SARAH: Yeah, Chase can help Dylan get over Ashleigh by fucking him.
KAYLA: I have never been so sad. This is the saddest day of my life. Okay, so it ended with them kissing on stage while he's fully naked.
MIRANDA: At school.
SARAH: Okay, okay. We're even looking beyond the fact that he's naked in front of his entire school, and there's so many things wrong with that. Like, that's fucking good though, that he was like, oh, I'm naked, I'm going to be smart, and I'm going to make you embarrassed rather than me, by kissing you. That’s smart.
KAYLA: He’s good.
MIRANDA: It’s also some confidence like, I’m naked so here we go.
KAYLA: I mean, in typical fuckboy fashion, he's very confident.
SARAH: Yeah, for sure
MIRANDA: But what they do while in that situation?
SARAH: What do you mean?
MIRANDA: In real life? I feel like it would be –
KAYLA: I don't know, I’ve never –
SARAH: Well, in real life they would be in huge trouble for being naked on stage.
KAYLA: In real life, none of this could happen
MIRANDA: In real life, they’d be running away.
KAYLA: Oh, probably.
SARAH: For sure.
KAYLA: Also, his penis is definitely small.
SARAH: It can't be that small if he’s just so open.
KAYLA: But the bar that they used to – (stutters) No. Small. It’s your boy, skinny penis.
SARAH: Again, I don't have a good feel for the ratio of penis to body.
(30:00)
MIRANDA: You don't know If anything’s up to scale on this app.
KAYLA: I guess, I don't know.
SARAH: The animation is not like, Disney Pixar.
MIRANDA: We’re going with Disney Pixar?
KAYLA: I want Disney Pixar to make this movie. Bad Boy Steals my Bra.
SARAH: (laughs) No.
KAYLA: Disney Pixar suddenly starts making porn.
SARAH: I was really disappointed though, because on the cover photo, the bra was red and it was not red.
KAYLA: It was flowery and stupid. Maybe when they finally fuck, she’ll wear a red bra.
MIRANDA: That’s a high possibility.
SARAH: You know how he's going to steal her bra? By taking it off of her so they can fuck.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Great ideas.
KAYLA: Here's the thing though. Does he really like her, or is he just a fuck boy?
SARAH: I think, okay, here's the thing.
KAYLA: Here it is.
SARAH: He seems to be a fuck boy but also, it doesn't seem like this is – I guess he just moved back, but I feel like maybe this isn't normal behavior for him. I feel like he's like, ooh, I'm a fuck boy but I'm going to take this way too far, because I actually really like this girl, and I don't know what to do with myself. Emotions?
KAYLA: Plus, she also was challenging him. So I feel like most girls in the face of a fuck boy, will not fight back. So maybe he's attracted to the fact that she's standing up for herself.
SARAH: I think he's actually attracted to her.
KAYLA: I think so too. Maybe she’ll just change his ways.
SARAH: Okay, what do you think the fate of Violet is going to be?
KAYLA: Violet is going to get to Z and Z is going to be her person, she gets all the way to Z and that’s –
SARAH: Zoe. What other Z names are there?
KAYLA: Zeke.
SARAH: Zeke. (laughs)
KAYLA: Hey, Zeke.
MIRANDA: Zaid.
KAYLA: What?
SARAH: Zaid. I guess –
KAYLA: Zayn. I want it to be a girl.
SARAH: I think it should be Zoe. Gay.
KAYLA: So my theory on Violet is she finally gets to Z, and that's been the one all along.
MIRANDA: I think there's going to be someone halfway through the alphabet that's going to throw her off.
KAYLA: Throw her for a loop? But she's already on K.
MIRANDA: I feel like she’s going to get to the S or T range –
KAYLA: And then like, fall in love and be like, I have to continue, but I’m in love.
MIRANDA: She’s going to be conflicted like, I had this plan, and now you're ruining my plan.
KAYLA: That’s a good – I like it.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So we think Dylan is going to be sad, but Chase will be like, there there, you're gay anyway.
SARAH: He's bi, he's totally bi. I strongly believe that.
KAYLA: I like it. What happens to Tianna?
SARAH: Tianna/Dove Cameron is – I don't know, we don’t care.
KAYLA: (gasps) Maybe Violet falls in love with Tianna.
SARAH: No.
KAYLA: All right.
SARAH: She’s better than Tianna.
KAYLA: What do we think this tragic backstory with Toby and her dead sister are?
SARAH: I don't know
KAYLA: Because she was like, it's been a year and I'm still missing my sister so much. But also, there's something with Toby where like, we haven't been back to a party since that night with Toby.
SARAH: Something happened at a party.
MIRANDA: Could be like drunk driving.
KAYLA: (gasps) He drunk drove and killed our sister.
SARAH: Maybe.
KAYLA: Why is everyone making fun of her, then?
SARAH: Or he roofied her and something happened.
MIRANDA: It has something to do with alcohol, I’d guess.
KAYLA: Why would anyone like make fun of her for that, though, when it's so serious?
SARAH: High school and also –
KAYLA: A 13-year-old definitely wrote this.
SARAH: I think a minor wrote this.
KAYLA: I hope so. Because anyone our age should know better than all of this.
SARAH: I know people make fun of young people writing fanfiction and stuff a lot. I get it, because I'm looking at the plot of this and being like, ugh. But also, they need to figure stuff out still.
KAYLA: But also, there are some really good writers. My thing is, some people just aren't old enough to thoroughly think through these situations, and realize what's wrong with it. They might just be like, ooh, sexy or hot and they don't really see why it could be a dangerous situation.
SARAH: Right, and some readers or users of the app will be like – They'll be able to overlook that, but we, with our viewpoint –
KAYLA: Our critical eye. (laughs) Hey, Miranda looks like a full burrito right now.
SARAH: With your feet hanging. Okay, hold on. Can we look at some of the other stories and guess what they are? That's what I'd like to do.
KAYLA: I'm so mad that that's like not a full – It seems like eventually it will be a full thing. Wait, let me see if I can learn anything.
MIRANDA: It’s just trying to get you interested and come back.
SARAH: We’d probably have to replay the whole thing though, wouldn’t we?
KAYLA: I don't think so. I added it to my Favorites so hopefully – Oh, there's a Mean Girls one.
SARAH: Exciting.
KAYLA: Okay, Bad Boy’s Girl.
SARAH: What?
MIRANDA: Bad Boy’s –
KAYLA: So I can tell you the plot, the description. “Tessa had a crush on Jay Stone for years, but when his half-brother Cole Stone comes back to town, everything changes”. See, this one is fully released, 30 episodes.
SARAH: Wow.
KAYLA: Listen if you guys want this to be a recurring thing, we can do these every once in a while.
SARAH: Just tell us, speak to us.
KAYLA: Because I think this is fun, but you guys might be totally bored.
SARAH: Yeah, I don't know. What do you think the plot of that is? I think it will be –
KAYLA: I think it's pretty obvious what the plot is.
SARAH: No, I have a great idea. So she has a crush on Jay, or Jake or whatever.
KAYLA: Jay.
SARAH: But his half-brother, step-brother, whatever comes to the town –
KAYLA: Half-brother.
SARAH: And half-brother and her start hitting it off and she's like, oh no, but Jay, and then she has a friend that's like, you need to get over Jay, he doesn't like you. So then she’s going to start dating Cole –
KAYLA: But then Jay’s going to –
SARAH: Cole Sprouse. (laughs)
KAYLA: It’s Cole Stone.
SARAH: I’m kidding, it’s not Cole Sprouse. She would never leave Cole Sprouse. But then things with – But then, Cole Sprouse has to leave again and then she's like, oh no, I'm sad. But then Jay is like wow, I was really jealous of my step-brother when you were with him, and they're going to get together, the end.
KAYLA: I like it.
MIRANDA: True story.
KAYLA: What else do we have? I'm falling for the Dolan twins. “Cameron Dallas: “Started with a Lie”.
SARAH: I've watched someone play a bit of that one actually, it's pretty funny.
KAYLA: Oh, there's a Pitch Perfect one. “Three Weeks to Live”.
MIRANDA: I have a question.
KAYLA: Oh, this one is another one where there's other ones coming soon, so our one that we played, more episodes will be coming soon. They’re just not all out yet. Maybe there's like one a week, like a show, like an episode.
SARAH: How do these things get made?
KAYLA: They’re users’ stories.
SARAH: Do people design it, and they’re inputted for okaying by the people?
KAYLA: I'm not sure.
MIRANDA: There’s probably a screening process.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: It seems so.
SARAH: Would they get money? Probably not.
KAYLA: I'm not sure, let me see –
SARAH: They probably don't get money.
KAYLA: I doubt it. Author profile for the one we did, the bra one, so you can see the things that they recommend. Yeah, I'm not sure how this works
SARAH: What do they recommend?
KAYLA: I don't know, I already went away from it. “User Stories, Create”. So we can create a story? I'm just going to go in to see what this looks like.
SARAH: Oh no, danger.
MIRANDA: But we could make one.
SARAH: We could make one.
KAYLA: Could we make an ace one?
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: They would never accept it.
MIRANDA: It would just be trying to avoid all sexual situations, at all costs.
KAYLA: Honestly, this would be –
MIRANDA: And then accidental –
KAYLA: You would have to pay 20 diamonds to have sex. It'd be free to take the ace option.
SARAH: You would have to pay 300 diamonds.
KAYLA: (sings) Diamonds.
SARAH: Okay, what is happening?
KAYLA: It's still loading.
SARAH: Oh, a disaster.
MIRANDA: Oh noooo.
KAYLA: “Need writing tips? Check out our forums. Yes, people just don't know how you can edit characters. Tap and hold their icon”. That means someone did all this work for like – This is so much work.
SARAH: I mean it's kind of cool though, even if the story was lacking in some areas.
KAYLA: This is a fun pastime. It's like fanfiction, but way more –
SARAH: Yeah, it's more interactive.
KAYLA: Interactive. Yeah, I can get behind it, I just wish they would write something better.
SARAH: They do have ones like the Mean Girls and the Pitch Perfect
KAYLA: Yeah, there's sponsored stories.
SARAH: They seem to be like actual fanfic, almost. Are those sponsored by those people?
MIRANDA: I think so.
SARAH: They’re paying for fanfic?
KAYLA: Honestly, seems like it. Okay, we had to get out of the app, we’re going back in. There’s too much loading – We’ll look at making a story another time. Let us know if you're interested. What was I doing?
SARAH: Look at the ones recommended by that author.
KAYLA: Okay, they recommend Summer Share “You rent a beach house with your girlfriends, only to find three hot guys already there. But what are they hiding?”.
MIRANDA: Their dicks.
KAYLA: The Royal Baby. “You fall in love, find out he's a prince and that you're pregnant with the royal baby. Will you live happily ever after?”
SARAH: I thought you were going to say “Will you live?”
KAYLA: Dangerous Love, “Jules didn't expect to fall for Cabe, the tough guy who was sleeping in her guest bed instead of serving time in juvie”. What the heck?
SARAH: What how does that even –
KAYLA: There’s a Pretty Little Liars one.
Hollywood with Hayes, “Your summer internship takes a wild turn when you end up becoming Hayes Grier's assistant on his movie”. Is this someone I should know? Because I don’t.
SARAH: Yeah, that’s a person.
KAYLA: There’s a Clueless one.
Reunion Hook Up, “Your dream for the reunion: hook up with your crush. The reality: a dead body and being hit on by your BFF”. 10 episodes, it's complete.
MIRANDA: We could play it.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Wow. What are some other good ones?
SARAH: There’s a lot to unpack there.
KAYLA: Marriage by Law, “What happens when two complete strangers are forced into an arranged marriage they don't want? All hell breaks loose”. Arranged marriages are just a thing.
SARAH: Pretty common.
KAYLA: My Brother's Best Friend, “Emily's –
SARAH: (sings) My best friend’s brother is the one for me.
(40:00)
KAYLA: Stop it. Stop it. “Emily's new roommate is the most conceited and flirtatious guy in school. Can she get him out before he wins her heart?” In school? Do they go to high school together but room together?
SARAH: Do they go to college?
KAYLA: What?
SARAH: Wait, so who –
KAYLA: We don't know, there's nothing about –
SARAH: Confused.
MIRANDA: It could be boarding school.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Hot as Hell, “A fashion reality show when love is banned, friends are weapons, and everyone seems eager to kiss you or kill you”.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: Betting on the Boy, “All bets are off, and winner takes all when you take a gamble on a mysterious bad boy named Drake”. Why so many bad boys?
SARAH: There seems to be a lot of –
KAYLA: Ooh, genres.
SARAH: Oh my God. There seems to be a lot of –
KAYLA: Thriller, Horror.
SARAH: Can you calm down? There seems to be a lot of variety. I mean, yeah, bad boys and straight people falling in love. But like, there is some variety in what they're about, which is interesting.
KAYLA: Yeah, I mean the genres are Romance, Drama, Fantasy, Mystery, Comedy, Action and Thriller. I want to see what Fantasy is –
SARAH: What’s the different between horror and thriller?
KAYLA: Vampire’s Kiss.
SARAH: Is one of them scarier?
KAYLA: I can envision in my mind what the difference is, but I couldn't explain it.
MIRANDA: Thriller is more heart-racing and horror can be just like –
KAYLA: More like drama?
SARAH: Terrifying?
MIRANDA: Yes.
SARAH: Thriller is like you're constantly – I don't know –
KAYLA: Wait, Witches – Rich Witches in HD.
SARAH: HD?
KAYLA: “What's better than being 16 and unsupervised in Manhattan? Being a witch too”. So some of these don't seem romantic, they're just like, fantasy.
SARAH: That’s fine.
KAYLA: “You are Amber Edwards, the least popular girl in school, but everything changes when you find a doorway to another world”. See, this is interesting, because these are the kind of stories I would write when I was a kid. But like, this gives you a whole new –
SARAH: You know what the vibe I get from this is? It's interactive Wattpad.
KAYLA: You’re so right.
SARAH: These are the kinds of stories that you would find on Wattpad
KAYLA: Here's my thing. This is so sad because the ads – Miranda is just full burrito. The ads that they were showing on Tumblr and stuff are always about the stupid romantic ones. But if they want to market these? I could be interested. I know when I was a young teenager, this is something I would’ve been really interested in, because this is really cool.
SARAH: Are there ads on Wattpad? They should advertise on Wattpad.
KAYLA: Is what I’m just saying.
SARAH: Because it's definitely the vibe that they have on Wattpad. I would say AO3 and fanfiction.net, no.
KAYLA: Because looking at these, a lot of these look really cool, but no one’s going to go to the Fantasy section, because all the ones on the front page are sex ones.
SARAH: Yeah. I think it's a cool thing –
KAYLA: Dragon Bound? How ace.
SARAH: That’s exciting.
KAYLA: “Since you found out you're a dragon, you've been held captive” – Since you found out you were a dragon?
SARAH: (laughs)
KAYLA: “What happens when you escape and find others like you?” We’re adding that one to our favorites.
SARAH: Okay, do let us know if you like this sort of thing. Because it's fun for us, but I don't know.
KAYLA: Miranda looks not that enthused, so maybe that should tell us something.
SARAH: Miranda’s just laying on the ground.
KAYLA: Was it fun to listen to this, Miranda?
MIRANDA: (muffled) It was very entertaining.
KAYLA: Well, one listener who sometimes listens to our podcast, Miranda.
MIRANDA: I try. I hear most of it from downstairs.
KAYLA: That’s true.
SARAH: Okay, so what's our poll this week?
KAYLA: Oh, no. Oh no.
SARAH: That's our poll. (laughs)
KAYLA: Do you want this again? Yes or no?
SARAH: That's a boring poll.
KAYLA: But I want to know, they're not going to tell us if we don't ask. They never tell us when we don't explicitly ask.
SARAH: (coughs) You.
KAYLA: We're dragging you all, do you hear this? This is me dragging you, by the weave.
SARAH: Or we could do something on the line of, which would you be interested in us doing? This, this, this or nothing?
KAYLA: Okay. Which would you –
SARAH: Okay, okay. Which would you would you be interested in us doing, a) continuing The Bad Boy Stole my Bra once it's up, b) a fantasy one, c) create your own and d) –
KAYLA: Stop this.
SARAH: Stop it, I don't want this.
KAYLA: I don't like it.
SARAH: And listen, it's anonymous. You don't even have to have a Twitter to vote in Twitter polls.
KAYLA: Really?
SARAH: Maybe you do.
KAYLA: Oh my God.
SARAH: I don't actually know, I just made a baseless claim.
KAYLA: You can also send us anonymous asks on Tumblr.
SARAH: You sure can.
KAYLA: Or an anomynous email, an anomynous – Oh no, I'm so sleepy. An anemone.
SARAH: Anyway, you can find – Okay, so our poll –
KAYLA: You already said it.
SARAH: Okay, fine. You can find our poll on Twitter @soundsfakepod. You can also find us on Tumblr at soundfakepod.tumblr.com, or you can email us soundfakepod@gmail.com. Kayla, where can they listen?
KAYLA: SoundCloud, iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Castbox, Overcast, some other things that I don’t remember. Really, literally anywhere you can find podcasts. Somehow our podcast just appeared there.
SARAH: There it is.
KAYLA: We didn’t do it, it’s been kind of weird but you’ll find us.
SARAH: Yay. We also have a Patreon –
KAYLA: Miranda looks dead.
SARAH: Okay, they can't see her. I need you to stop narrating
KAYLA: Do you ever look at someone though, when they’re just still and you wait for them to breathe because you like think they be dead? I do that with my dog a lot, I get scared.
MIRANDA: That’s what I was going for.
KAYLA: Anyway.
SARAH: Okay, our Patreon patreon.com/soundsfakepod. Miranda does not sponsor us.
KAYLA: Miranda doesn't sponsor us. If you want us to be able to pay for things with diamonds, you will need to pay us because it takes money to get diamonds.
MIRANDA: I have no money.
KAYLA: Alright.
SARAH: That’s okay. Alright, we have our $5 patrons, we first have Sydney Mook, her Instagram is @sydneymoo. You can also – What? We’re struggling.
KAYLA: I’m dying.
SARAH: Another one of our $5 dollar patrons is –
KAYLA: Another one.
SARAH: (to Kayla) Shhh. Jennifer Smart, you can find her – Kayla. You can find her on Instagram by looking up Lehen Productions. I made a mistake; Jennifer Smart, her YouTube is Lehen Productions, not her Instagram. Is that a meowing cat?
MIRANDA: It is.
SARAH: The cat’s meowing loudly. Then we have Asritha Vinnakota, you can find her on Instagram that's @asritha_v. If you're into K-pop, message her.
KAYLA: So is she.
SARAH: Yeah. Our $10 patron is Emma. You can find her on YouTube by looking up Emma T Fink. Thanks for listening, tune in next Sunday for more of us in your ears.
KAYLA: And until then, take good care of your cows.