Ep 253: What's In and What's Out?
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SARAH: Hey, what's up, hello, welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aro ace girl, I'm Sarah, that's me.
KAYLA: And a bi demisexual girl, that's me, Kayla.
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don't understand.
KAYLA: On today's episode, what's in and what's out?
SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds Fake But Okay.
(theme music)
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod.
KAYLA: I was gonna make the like, what sounds, what the episode is about just innies and outies, but I was afraid to lose people within the first 30 seconds.
SARAH: Yeah. I mean, I'm sure we're good at that, though. I'm sure we can lose people like that. (snaps)
KAYLA: I'm sure we can. Because this was an idea from my roommates, and they were like, but if you do this, you have to refer to it as innies and outies.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: Because we refer to a lot of things in our house as uppies and downies.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: So
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: very adult household that I live in. Anyway, how are you – oh, Sarah's curling a weight.
SARAH: I – a couple weeks ago, I bought this three pound weight at Target.
KAYLA: Just one?
SARAH: Yes, for my wrist. It's for my wrist.
KAYLA: Now one wrist is gonna be stronger than the other.
SARAH: No, this wrist is already weaker.
KAYLA: Oh, your body.
SARAH: It’s my fucked up wrist. And so I got it, because I used to use my ankle weights for this, but they were like a weird, they were weird to hold. And so I got this so that if I'm ever just sitting here, I can just strengthen my wrist.
KAYLA: Well, you look really swole in your bear onesie curling your three pound weight.
SARAH: I am wearing a bear onesie.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: Buy our book.
KAYLA: I would also like to make an announcement. Recently, our friend Erin has been transcribing some of the backlog for us.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: So, shout out to them. And they've been sending us screenshots of part of transcripts. And you guys, we used to be funny. I don't know that we're funny anymore.
SARAH: What happened
KAYLA: I feel like I'm too close to it. But they were sending us some screenshots. I was like, this is actually the funniest thing I've ever read.
SARAH: I would say that's a little too far. But I mean, yeah.
KAYLA: Anyway, this has just been an announcement that did you know we were funny once?
SARAH: Yeah. And if you want to financially support us becoming more funny in the future, you can buy our book. You know, I got a really nice DM on Instagram today from my old neighbor
KAYLA: Oh
SARAH: who we used to like play with all the time as kids. And her parents moved out of the house a couple years ago. So like her parents don't even like live near my parents anymore. But she texted me and she was like, I read your book. I thought it was really good. Your podcast is great. I hope you're doing well.
KAYLA: That’s so –aw
SARAH: And I was like, Oh, I don't know if she like still I don't know if she listens to the if you do. Hi.
KAYLA: Hello. Do you remember Nick from college who looks like he has a peanut allergy but doesn't?
SARAH: Now, if you had left it at Nick from college, I would have no idea who you're talking about. And when you say he looks like he has a peanut allergy but doesn't, I can't picture a face but I do know who you're talking like I there's a vibe and I've – you've captured it.
KAYLA: Yeah, he was not in Quidditch. He was in NERDS with us.
SARAH: Yes.
KAYLA: Um, anyway
SARAH: Was he a twink.
KAYLA: You can't say that. Was he a twink?
SARAH: I don't for my own personal
KAYLA:. I think you're thinking of someone else.
SARAH: Okay.
KAYLA: Anyway.
SARAH: Oh, yes. Yeah. Less twink, more otter, but maybe straight.
KAYLA: He was a nurse like a nursing student.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Yeah. Okay. We're on the same page.
KAYLA: I don't even know that he's queer. He's – I think he might be straight.
SARAH: That's why I said less twink, more otter, but probably straight. I really hope he's listening.
KAYLA: Anyway, he snapchatted me the other day. Well, he snapchatted me when he got the book and was like, Oh, I'm so excited. And then he messaged me the other day saying he finished it. And then it was very good that he misses us.
SARAH: So I'm sorry, I forgot.
KAYLA: I don't know if I want him to hear this or not.
SARAH: if it makes you feel any better, I don't know who I am.
KAYLA: You know, that's true. I think I knew him much better than I think you did. So
SARAH: didn't you didn't you get to know him a lot better when I was in Germany.
KAYLA: Yes. Yeah. I did.
SARAH: Yeah. Anyway. Speaking of Germany
KAYLA: oh
(05:00)
SARAH: me and our friend Miranda, who has been on this podcast before recently passed our six years streak
KAYLA: It says nothing to do with Germany.
SARAH: It does because it started when I was in Germany. I checked what I checked what date it was recently. I didn't see that.
KAYLA: That's a long long
SARAH: I googled what was 2913 days ago. 2009. It doesn't matter. It's a long time.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Like, I could I could I could live without, like social media for a day, I would feel horrible, but I could do it. But the thing I would be most worried about is specifically that Snapchat strategy.
KAYLA: Have you ever cheated? Have you ever done the thing where you email Snapchat and you're like
SARAH: Oh, I think we did. Yeah, I think we did. But it was several years ago. Anyway, uh, Kayla, what are we talking about this week? This week?
KAYLA: Listen, it's spring now. It's spring has sprung season.
SARAH: where – or it's fall. I guess you would call it autumn. In the places where it is that.
KAYLA: Oh, yeah, I guess so. Anyway, it's a new season now, wherever you are, I'm assuming. SARAH: Season two
KAYLA: season, it's season two. And listen, with the trends are changing, and we got to stay up to date with that we got to spring clean the old out and bring in the new. So we're here to report to you the news of in this season of our lives, what is in and what is out because Sarah and I are trend experts. Sarah's making quite the face at me.
SARAH: Sorry, I don't know your voice sounds a lot louder than usual. And the thing with doing this through zoom is I cannot adjust the loudness of your voice. So here's what I'm gonna do.
KAYLA: (laughing) Oh, she's gonna put. She's gonna put her headphones over her. You look great.
SARAH: My bear head headphones over the bear
KAYLA: Can you hear at all?
SARAH: Yeah, I can hear you just fine. The only thing I'm concerned about is that there might be more spillage to my mic. But well, you were just you were you were weirdly loud and I did not sorry about it.
KAYLA: Out: being loud
SARAH: in being quiet
KAYLA: in being quiet, except for recently. I was a little inebriated. I was a little. Am I being really loud still?
SARAH: No, no, no, you're not. I'm just like, concerned about the spillage. We're gonna go for one.
KAYLA: Okay. I was a little under the influence recently. And I had the ear munchies. And I it nothing could be loud enough. I needed sound screaming in my ears. So sometimes sound is in but oh, she's going. Why don't you just keep one on and like one behind your ear?
SARAH: Spillage would be bad.
KAYLA: No, no, like this
SARAH: Behind my ear/ I'm busy.
KAYLA: No, no, like this one.
SARAH: I'm busy.
KAYLA: It's okay. You'll call it I'll just cause hearing damage.
SARAH: There's so much wax in there anyway blocking all this.
KAYLA: out having ear wax blockage.
SARAH: Oh my god. So true.
KAYLA: True. In ear wax removal.
SARAH: Not having to go to your PCP before you get your ear. I have cause I have to make an appointment to see my regular doctor to get a referral. I don't want to do that.
KAYLA: But out medical confusion. Why is the medical system so confusing? I don't understand how insurance works. I do not understand how my doctor works. I had to request to refill my prescription five times to two different pharmacies.
SARAH: Good.
KAYLA: And the lady when I eventually finally got to pick up my med she was like, So do you need another refill? Because I think there was probably 50 requests for refills on her computer. And I was like, No, no, just the one for now. Just this, please.
SARAH: I may have recently accidentally volunteered my sister to help my boss with Medicare. Everything's, you know, everything's fine.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: There's another thing I needed to do that was medical that I thought of. I was thinking ahead about how I need to find an eye doctor. Hmm. Anyway
KAYLA: well, if you want to go to the Bay area, Dean's sister can be your eye doctor.
SARAH: Is she in network?
KAYLA: I don't fucking know. Let me call her. Yeah. Hello. Are you in network?
SARAH: Are you in Sarah's network?
KAYLA: Are you in Sarah’s network? I don't know what Sarah's network is, but are you in it?
KAYLA: Are you in it? Amazing.
SARAH: You know what I think is out?
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KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Valentine's day. I don't care. It's been done. Like ad nauseam. We've done Valentine's day.
KAYLA: You know, it's okay.
SARAH: I have, this is, there's a follow up.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: What's in is obscure, weirdly specific holidays. Like, like why aren't we be wearing the ides of every month? Like we've beware the ides of, of March. But what about April? What's going on in August about the ides of March?
KAYLA: You’re really passionate about the ides of March
SARAH: I think they're fun.
KAYLA: Like, I feel like we have this conversation every March.
SARAH: What about the ides of January, Kayla?
KAYLA: I gotta be honest with you. I don't remember what the ides of March is.
SARAH: It's the 15th. It's halfway. What's, it's when Julius Caesar was stabbed. That's why beware the ides of March because some, some soothsayer was like, beware the ides of March. And he was like, nah, I'm good. And then that's the day he got stabbed in the back on the senate floor.
KAYLA: Well, listen, his salad is great. So
SARAH: yeah, he has a good salad. I think he died a martyr because that salad, to me, his death is worth that salad to me.
KAYLA: He was going to die eventually. Anyway
SARAH: we all do. another, no, but like also, sorry, I have one more thing that I wrote down as a weirdly specific holiday. I don't know if this holiday exists, but like, why don't I get the day off work for national jello day?
KAYLA: I'm sure there's a national jello day. Speaking of holidays, someone, we were talking about, in our discord, people were talking about exes recently. Recently, I mean today for us, but yes?
SARAH: there is not a national jello day. There is however, an eat your jello day. That sounds, which is a national day and it's on July 12th. All right. Mark that down. I don't like, maybe the day that the last Harry Potter movie came out. That date’s in, that, that dates in my brain for some reason.
KAYLA: I mean, that is like halfway through the year. That's like Christmas in July or whatever.
SARAH: It came out on… July 15th.
KAYLA: Alright.
SARAH: Maybe it's someone's birthday. Is that a member of five seconds of summer's birthday? KAYLA: We're never going to get there. I was just trying to tell a story.
SARAH: Well, Ashton's is the seventh. Is it Luke's?
KAYLA: Oh no. Can we talk about Liam Payne's plastic surgery?
SARAH: Luke's is July 16th. Liam Payne looks
KAYLA: out plastic surgery. He looks 50 years older.
SARAH: What happened to him?
KAYLA: Like literally looking at the side by side pictures, he looks so much older with plastic surgery. Like his, he's gaunt.
SARAH: He looks like someone stuck rulers in his face and then sucked all the fat out.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: it's not good.
KAYLA: I want to go back to what I was saying though.
SARAH: Sorry. What – was it to do with jello?
KAYLA: We were talking about, we were talking about very specific holidays
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: to celebrate instead of Valentine's day, because Valentine's day is out. In our discord recently, a barefoot backpacker was saying that it's funny we talked about Croatia last week because it is home to the museum of broken relationships where people like put mementos from like exes and stuff.
SARAH: Mm
KAYLA: And Bagel said that she has a friend who every October 10th celebrates “ex” day and she wears clothes that she's stolen from her exes.
SARAH: I did see that. I think that’s very good
KAYLA: I think that's a holiday we should all adopt because I think that's funny.
SARAH: I don't have anything.
KAYLA: And then I was telling the discord that, in my household I've been, I've been referred to as the patron saint of regrets because I have been given by my roommates several mementos from past relationships that they like, cannot hold on to at the moment for like
SARAH: what kinds of things?
KAYLA: like pictures and stuff that they like, they want to keep and have later in life
SARAH: I see
KAYLA: but like right now they don't want.
SARAH: So they're like a little, like a little figurine of a dog who speaks Spanish.
KAYLA: You know, it's crazy that you say that because like, yes, that's exactly what I have.
SARAH: Okay, perfect.
KAYLA: Anyway, their tithes to me are these are, and I'm the patron saint of regret. Anyway, in gummy vitamins.
SARAH: Mm yeah
KAYLA: I recently started taking a gummy vitamin and it's like a fun little snack in the morning.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Just a silly little snack.
SARAH: Good.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: You know what I think is out? Love triangles is a plot device.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Been there, done that. Done that. It's boring.
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SARAH: They're so contrived. Like I just, I'm not into it. What's in? Friendship triangles as a plot device. Your mom says you can only bring one friend to the carnival.
KAYLA: Oh no
SARAH: Only one friend can go to the carnival with you, but you have two best friends. You only have one more ticket to the concert, but both of your friends are huge stans. What are you going to do?
KAYLA: So that's like some, that is like even more stressful to me than a love triangle for some reason. Cause the thing about that is that's like too real.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: I feel like everyone in their life has dealt with that situation of your family being like, you can bring one fan friend on our like little family road trip. And then you're like, well, now one of my friends is going to be sad. But like who fi- who actually finds themselves in a love triangle? Hot people?
SARAH: Hot people probably.
KAYLA: I guess. I don't know.
SARAH: I don't know. Well, also I feel like with love triangles, like people, people expect relationships will either become your entire life or it will end. Whereas with friendships
KAYLA: (laughing) I was yawning
SARAH: (laughing) I know you were, but it looked very silly. You looked like a little baby dinosaur.
KAYLA: Thank you.
SARAH: But with friendship, like you don't expect it to end. And so like if you're in a love triangle, you expect one of them to win, you know?
KAYLA: Well, yeah, because in a love triangle, when it's like monogamy, it's like, well, when you pick one, you can't pick the other. When in friendship, just cause you're friends with one person doesn't mean you can't be…
SARAH: Which means you have to deal with the results of who you picked moving forward in your relationship with these people.
KAYLA: Which isn't fun.
SARAH: Yeah. And sometimes you just don't, you don't have, the only bad choices.
KAYLA: So true. in: doing nothing.
SARAH: Oh, so true.
KAYLA: Me and my therapist have been working a lot on my gifted kid burnout syndrome of being like, I have to do the productivity. And she's started assigning me leisure time as homework.
SARAH: Oh my God.
KAYLA: So in: nothing.
SARAH: Now see, I'm a little bit different.
KAYLA: Yeah. You need to do the opposite.
SARAH: I have ADHD and I do a lot of nothing and feel immense guilt about it the whole time.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Out. The electoral college. I just think there's gotta be a better way to do it.
KAYLA: There is. It's the popular vote.
SARAH: There is. It's tried and true.
KAYLA: It's proven. It is a better way.
SARAH: So many others have done it. There is a better way. But instead
KAYLA: Here we are
SARAH: we're passing out votes like little candies and saying, you get 30 candies, but they all have to be the same flavor unless you're New Hampshire or the other state that's
KAYLA: I’m losing you. But okay.
SARAH: Just imagine little candies like the kind an old lady would give you individually wrapped.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Sometimes they melt. Sometimes they turn out to be a cough drop.
KAYLA: Huh?
SARAH: What's in? What's in?
KAYLA: In?
SARAH: Is a, is a, I feel, I feel the need to have an in to go with each out, but I guess I don't have to do that.
KAYLA: Sure. Let me look around my room.
SARAH: You know what's in is this tiny desk vacuum
KAYLA: Oh my god
SARAH: that I talked about last week. I haven't even used it because there's still shit all over my desk, but it's just sitting right here. And I just think it's so charming and lovely.
KAYLA: I'm so happy for you. Out banning books, but in, I think banning dictionaries. I think that if we're going to ban any book here, go with me logically here.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: Okay. The people, the stupid people are like, we have to ban the book that has the gay character because it's going to turn my child gay or whatever.
SARAH: Yeah. The kid’s already gay
KAYLA: They think it's going to happen. Your honor, your child is already gay.
SARAH: It's too late.
KAYLA: It's too late. But by that logic, the dictionary has all of the information.
SARAH: It has every gay word.
KAYLA:Including the word gay and recently
SARAH: Trans.
KAYLA: Demisexual.
SARAH: Yeah.
KAYLA: So I'm just saying by that logic, encyclopedia, dictionary.
SARAH: They probably would want to redact it.
KAYLA: Thesaurus.
SARAH: They would just want to redact it.
KAYLA: Well, that doesn't seem, they're banning all the other ones.
SARAH: So they, so they would keep all the stuff. Words like fiscal conservatism.
(20:00)
SARAH: Fiscal conservatism. I fucked up the delivery. Fuck.
KAYLA: Thought it was real tough. Fisting conservatism.
SARAH: Fiscal conservatism. That was going to be good and I fucked it up.
KAYLA: Well, I'm just saying if they're going to ban the books, then ban the dictionary. That's all I'm saying. In library. Do you know-
SARAH: Just one?
KAYLA: Yes. Do you know how many books you can read for free? So many. I've read so many books for free and I don't even have to go to the library. They just come to my phone through the app.
SARAH: Did you know that the entire audio books of all the Hunger Games books are for free on Spotify and have been forever?
KAYLA: I knew that Spotify started doing audio books, but I thought they were all for money. I do not know.
SARAH: Suzanne Collins said, fuck you.
KAYLA: I have, you know what seems to be in, we're in now that the Hunger Games movies are on Netflix. Everyone's been talking about them.
SARAH: There's so much discourse.
KAYLA: The Hunger Games renaissance, I think, is upon us, which isn't the new movie coming out soon. I feel like they must have done this on purpose.
SARAH: Yeah. Well, there's like this weird group of people that are like kind of stans of the, what are they called? Like the districts one, two, and four where like they train for the Hunger Games, the careers
KAYLA: Interesting.
SARAH: There are like people who have become like weird stans of the career tributes.
KAYLA: That doesn't quite make sense to me, but go off, I guess.
SARAH: And then there are some conspiracy people who believe that Katniss was the chosen one and that like President Snow like had his eye on her the whole time and that it was only Prim's name in the bowl and that he just didn't expect her to volunteer.
KAYLA: I have seen that
SARAH: But it's like the whole thing that she is not. She is not the chosen one. Like, like, like Suzanne was like, hey, here's the thing. She's just some random bitch.
KAYLA: She's just some guy.
SARAH: And that's the whole point is that some random bitch can spark a revolution. Anyway, out spam emails.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: out yelling at people on the internet, in driving to their home, acquiring a very large boombox and playing Bollywood music as loud as you can outside their window 24/7.
KAYLA: Why Bollywood?
SARAH: I don't know. I just wanted something like lively and bright and loud, you know?
KAYLA: Mhm.
SARAH: Because, you know, even if they're a Bollywood music fan, which they should be,
KAYLA: It’ll be old after a while.
SARAH: But like if it is full volume 24 seven, when you're just trying to live your life, you know,
KAYLA: out overhead lighting in 1000 other lights instead.
SARAH: True. Or if you're going to have overhead lighting, have it not be LED. No over lead. Only overhead.
KAYLA: Make it those yellow ones.
SARAH: Or which I know they're like worse for like they take up more electricity. Wow. Can't talk. And they like use up those like filaments and whatever. But there are some LED lights now that are intended to imitate incandescent light bulbs.
KAYLA: That’s true
SARAH: And those are the ones that we go for.
KAYLA: Yeah. Or just get the ones that are like can be any color and you can just make it like yellow.
SARAH: Yeah. Out. Diet culture.
KAYLA: I've been – I've never seen the movie Devil Wears Prada. I aspire to see it.
SARAH: It's a good movie. I've seen it.
KAYLA: At this point. I've seen almost all of it through clips on TikTok. Out of order though.
SARAH: Florals for spring? Groundbreaking.
KAYLA: But there's part of it where like Anne Hathaway is talking to the other assistant or whatever.
SARAH: Emily Blunt.
KAYLA: And she's like, oh my god, you're so skinny. And Emily Blunt is like, thanks, I only eat a cube of cheese when I get tired or whatever. And I was just like, what in the 90s hell.
SARAH: And then Gwyneth Paltrow recently like went viral for saying that she just eats bone broth.
KAYLA: Gwyneth Paltrow is…
SARAH: Needs to be studied in a lab.
KAYLA: A wild individual. Also isn't she on trial right now?
SARAH: She's on trial in Utah.
KAYLA: Because like her and some, what was he?
SARAH: She ran into some guy skiing.
KAYLA: He's like a retired optometrist or something bougie.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: And they ran into each other skiing but now they're trying to figure out.
SARAH: They're suing each other because he says that she hit him and she says that he hit her. But one of them was behind the other. So like there's gotta be a way to figure that out based off of what happened to them. Like forensics.
KAYLA: But now they're in court with a jury
(25:00)
KAYLA: and I'm like, is this the time to do this?
SARAH: No. I don't know. No. Out, diet culture. I think it's bad. In, eating food.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: It's also in your body when you eat it. Food in. Food isn't, food isn't bad.
KAYLA: Yeah you need it actually.
SARAH: You need it to survive. Don't eat just one raw oat. Eat two raw oats.
KAYLA: Single raw oats.
SARAH: Eat two if that makes you happy.
KAYLA: At least two.
SARAH: Yeah. Sorry I'm just looking at my box of Cheerios and my brain was like yeah raw oats.
KAYLA: Raw oats. I think in for me recently has been bubblegum. I've been in the big bubblegum phase of my life.
SARAH: Very Paris Hilton of you.
KAYLA: Thank you. Yeah it's very Y2K resurgence. Trendy trendy.
SARAH: You know what's out?
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: Saying that Amanda Bynes was found naked in the street.
KAYLA: Who's saying that? What are you talking about?
SARAH: Recently Amanda Bynes was admitted into a psychiatric hospital.
KAYLA: I did not hear anything about this.
SARAH: She admitted herself.
KAYLA: Great. Good for her.
SARAH: She had a psychiatric event and she found herself naked on the street and she flagged a car down and called 911 and
KAYLA: yeah
SARAH: then she checked herself into a facility.
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: But all of the headlines were like Amanda Bynes found naked on the street. Forced to go to a psychiatric facility.
KAYLA: Oh no
SARAH: But it's like no she had the wherewithal to like realize that she was going through something that she needed help. Like she did a good job.
KAYLA: That's fucked up.
SARAH: I know. Poor Disney kids.
KAYLA: Yeah they're um apparently Lindsay Lohan is pregnant.
SARAH: I think I heard that.
KAYLA: My friend sent me a tweet that was like this is the perfect opportunity for a parent trap too where Lindsay where Annie and Halle are pregnant at the same time and then their children get switched at birth. Which like to me though that's not very compelling because it's like oh no my mom's identical twin. My aunt raised me instead. Like not to say who cares but also like
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: it's not like it's a stranger.
SARAH: So what were you were you one of those weird things where like you married identical twins also?
KAYLA: And then your kids are siblings and you all live in the same house?
SARAH: People who do that on purpose?
KAYLA: I'm like oh you're living in the same house. Get a life
SARAH: I saw a TikTok recently about this guy on TikTok who a couple years ago was like I would like to marry a stranger like for a bit. Like I would like to legally marry a stranger and so he he got a bunch of applications. He ended up marrying this one girl. Two years later they're still married.
KAYLA: I think I've seen this.
SARAH: They're happy as could be.
KAYLA: Honestly slay.
SARAH: Good for them. It's a fanfic shit. Out not tipping your tattoo artist. In tipping your tattoo artist.
KAYLA: You have to tip them.
SARAH: There's been a lot of restaurant tipping in the USA discourse on twitter recently and KAYLA: why?
SARAH: Well there are some Europeans mostly
KAYLA: It’s different though
SARAH: who are like no I refuse to tip 20% because it's an exploitative system and the employer should be paying the employees their due wages which is true.
KAYLA: You not tipping isn’t going to fix that though
SARAH: However you not tipping 20% just means that your waiter, a blue collar worker who is performing a service for you. All that means is that they can't pay for their fucking groceries now. Wow you got ‘em.
KAYLA: You know what this reminds me of? There's this episode of I think it's called like restaurant hell or something. It's one of Gordon Ramsay's shows where he goes to restaurants that are failing and he like yells at them and fixes it or whatever.
SARAH: Puts them between a sandwich.
KAYLA: Yeah and there's an episode where he finds out that all of the waiters’ tips just go to the owner.
SARAH: I think you mentioned this on the pod before.
KAYLA: Listen the whole episode is bananas because then Gordon Ramsay starts going up to customers and he's like do you know that this like tip you're giving your waitress like isn't going to your waitress it's going to the owner and all the customers are like what the fuck
SARAH: Fucked up
KAYLA: because it's fucked up.
SARAH: Yeah but there was one person who like really fucking pissed me off because in her bio she was like I'm a socialist and then and then she was like I refuse to tip more than 10% because it's wrong because the system is wrong and it's like
KAYLA: what
SARAH: and so you think you're gonna fix it?
(30:00)
SARAH: by making it so this person can't fucking feed themselves this week like what the fuck is your problem this system is bad it needs to be fixed you doing that is not helping don't come here if you're not willing to pay for it I'm I've gone off again
KAYLA: she's at she's off she's gone
SARAH: it's built in
KAYLA: in unions
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: that's all
SARAH: oh yeah in the la usd strike happening right now the public school district in los angeles second largest in the country the teachers and the school staff are on strike right now and that is in out the bitches who won't pay them their due bitch
KAYLA: bitches
SARAH: Bitches. I drove past them picketing because there's I drive past a middle school every day I live near one on my way to work. I live near one always but I drive past it on my way to work
KAYLA: yeah wait a second
SARAH: and they were they were picketing out outside and I was like oh my god should I do it and I gave them a little honk honk
KAYLA: that's very good
SARAH: it was very brave of me
KAYLA: you're so brave
SARAH: I know. Out internet and discourse just in general I think it's annoying stop talking stop talking about things
KAYLA: stop talk no one talk anymore. Out instagram being stupid just go back to being instagram just go back to pictures what are you doing
SARAH: out twitter putting shit on your feed of people you don't follow but not telling you that it's people you don't follow and then there's so much random shit on your feed elon what the fuck are you doing you're a piece of shit and I hate you
KAYLA: do you not have the separate for you and following pages on your twitter?
SARAH: I do but here's the thing I don't dislike the for you page in the way that it used to be
KAYLA: yes
SARAH: which was the people you would follow you would see their shit and you would
KAYLA: and their likes
SARAH: and then you would see sometimes recommended posts but they would always be identified as recommended posts
KAYLA: yeah it is confusing though
SARAH: and there there have been first of all not only do they not identify them anymore but there have been a lot more of them but
KAYLA: yeah
SARAH: it's like half my feed
KAYLA: yeah I know if I use the for you feature I don't see any people I follow
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: like ever which also I feel like no one I follow is tweeting anymore so that's probably part of it
SARAH: I don't I don't tweet from my my main boi no all the all the all the heat’s on this stan twitter
KAYLA: yeah gotta go
SARAH: there's also a lot of their discourse and I think it should stop everyone
KAYLA: stop talking
SARAH: stop talking stop it out being loud in being quiet we said at the top and we'll say it again KAYLA: sitting just sit everyone just sit down just sit
SARAH: unless you can't for medical reasons
KAYLA: we say as we loudly speak on our public podcast
SARAH: hey you can turn it off nobody’s stopping you
KAYLA: yeah go away
SARAH: we already got the download
KAYLA: go away actually. what are you doing here
SARAH: out under cooked chicken
KAYLA: yeah that's been out
SARAH: it's really not good
KAYLA: that could kill you
SARAH: yeah. In juicy chicken that's fully cooked. I'm hungry
KAYLA: I can tell
SARAH: in gay rat weddings
KAYLA: true. I love gay rat wedding.
SARAH: in capybara cappy cappy cappy my enunciation wasn't good and I fucked it up
KAYLA: why is the internet so enamored with capybaras? like they just like the animal of the year
SARAH: capybara is slay
KAYLA: okay
SARAH: (in a hispanic accent) top five evil cappie barter numero cinco, no no no no cappy not evil cappy nice and remember cappy is slay. okay my co-worker recently got on capybara tiktok
KAYLA: Ah good
SARAH: and we share the amazon for work and I saw that in her search history had been like capybara like plushies stuffed animals
KAYLA: oh no. good
SARAH: in meatball the dog my co-worker wearing a yellow raincoat
KAYLA: okay
SARAH: delight. it's I'll send you a picture
KAYLA: okay I mean like yeah that sounds it I also like your co-worker stevie nix
SARAH: oh yes
KAYLA: the blind rat dog
SARAH: my blind rat queen I love her so much I have never been charmed by little tiny rat dogs
(35:00)
SARAH: she's literally two pounds she's a
KAYLA: she's fugly
SARAH: she I love her so much she's so ugly
KAYLA: she's cute but she also ugly
SARAH: she's amazing. In recently I let my employer know that I would need a day off of work for the Agust D concert
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: and my co-worker said what's the concert because I didn't say I just said it was a concert and I said Agust d aka my bts bias it's a miracle I even got tickets and her response was those are certainly words
KAYLA: I feel like that’s every conversation I have with my boss he's just like all righty
SARAH: well she's an older millennial and I'm a millennial and we've so we have a lot of things in common but we have discovered that our generational divide is tumblr
KAYLA: ah
SARAH: I had a tumblr. I used tumblr – I was an active user of the tumble machine. she had a live journal and we've figured out that's what the generational divide is going to do
KAYLA: out sad beige toys for sad beige babies
SARAH: sad beige
KAYLA: why are we doing that? Why are you making your toys so sad?
SARAH: children do need color
KAYLA: it's like research
SARAH: have you seen the goth baby contrasting
KAYLA: the baby that has the creepy doll? That's a different baby
SARAH: I know like there's an emo baby who like loves wearing black
KAYLA: I've not seen this baby
SARAH: oh it's pretty good because like the the parents are like there's like a whole like emo baby room and like people are like no that kid needs color! And they're like okay come with me and then they open the door to the next room and it was just but like it's like victor – like like wednesday adams like
KAYLA: interesting
SARAH: is it called like goth baby? I can't remember exactly
KAYLA: there's a toddler I've seen on tiktok that is enamored with this like very creepy life-size doll that her aunt got her because her parents were like no, and she'll just like carry it around but it's like the size of a child and sometimes she like puts it on roller skates and like rolls it around the house and it's a very scary looking doll
SARAH: Good. I'm sending you the gothic baby
KAYLA: Okay. oh Meatball does look very nice in his little coat. he does look very good
SARAH: and also apparently like the gothic baby's dad is like a semi, semi like niche famous guy and he's like
KAYLA: I've seen this baby before I didn't know it was a gothic baby though
SARAH: but apparently the dad is like semi niche famous and he's like doesn't matter anymore I'm now just gothic baby's dad
KAYLA: wow this is a gothic baby
SARAH: that why her room looks like halloween it's amazing
KAYLA: that's very silly out seeing I've seen enough personally and I would not like to see anymore
SARAH: yeah out this episode of the podcast in the poll what is it
KAYLA: oh, get out of my room. Get out of my room
SARAH: she said yes get out
KAYLA: out of my room
SARAH: out of the closet out
KAYLA: what's we'll ask people what's in what's in
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: let me do it an open-ended
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: or like give them choices
KAYLA: what are the kids up to these days
SARAH: yeah we've gotten a little old so like we need to be yeah you know in check
KAYLA: I will admit there's been a few times recently where I have had to look up what a trend means and it has felt incredibly shameful
SARAH: every time I mentioned something that's like popular among the gen z kids like even the ones that like you know like my my older millennial co-worker she's completely familiar with um my boss thinks I am like a genius and so funny like the other day I said phone eats first
KAYLA: oh no
SARAH: and he was like
KAYLA: that's not even good
SARAH: and he was like oh that's so that's so good that's so funny and I was like the I did not make that up
KAYLA: oh the other day, okay the other day we were having like every Monday we have an all company meeting everyone gets on and they present little company updates or whatever and someone was presenting and the slide deck was looking really nice, and so I was in the like chat I was like at design team like the slide deck today looks very slay because I'm like friends with a lot of people in design team and they make the slide decks
(40:00)
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: so I was like oh slide deck is looking very slay and then everyone in the chat was like I just had to look up slay means they're like oh my god what's slay all these people
SARAH: you work at a company that targets I know young adults and teenagers
KAYLA: if we get into this too much I will actually get very angry
SARAH: yes that is that is not very slayful at all
KAYLA: I'm very aware and I will get angry about it so we have to not talk about that okay but so then everyone was like ha ha ha slay and then at the end of the meeting our CEO comes back on and he's like oh you know these things going well but uh blah blah blah you know we have to like keep motivated whatever and he goes and as Kayla said we just have to keep slaying it and I was like please please don't bring me into this
SARAH: don't say keep slaying it
KAYLA: please
SARAH: grammatically that makes sense that's not how you use it
KAYLA: everyone in the chat is like oh my god yes slay slay slay and I was like oh
SARAH: queen
KAYLA: I was so embarrassed to be part of that
SARAH: did you did you not feel bonita
KAYLA: I did not feel bonita
SARAH: oh that's too bad because you look bonita
KAYLA: thank you
SARAH: anyway tell us what's in and out tell us what's bonita I really thought that was the voice of Josh Gad
KAYLA:it's not who is it
SARAH: it's from South Park
KAYLA: oh I know it does sound like South Park
SARAH: oh no sorry it's not that it was Family Guy
KAYLA: not he also sounds like Family Guy
SARAH: so yeah but I was really I was so convinced it was Josh Gad I was like that's Olaf that is elder the other not
KAYLA: Cunningham?
SARAH: yeah anyway, cool. what's in what's out let us know or don't
KAYLA: that's fine
SARAH: or or be silent who cares who can don't
KAYLA: don't speak
SARAH: put the discourse away
KAYLA: and don't be within my eyesight, don't speak I've seen enough
SARAH: what's your beef in your juice this week my juice is new Jimin music my beef is why is everyone naked
KAYLA: yeah
SARAH: it's not like beef beef
KAYLA: Fake beef
SARAH: I'm fine, I'm fine with it in this context
KAYLA: yeah
SARAH: but like overwhelming
KAYLA: overwhelming
SARAH: shocking. Why do I see your titties why do I have to see the horrible words that people use to refer to Jimin’s nipples
KAYLA: I don't love that
SARAH: I made a tweet about it and only got four likes and I was like
KAYLA: that's too bad
SARAH: this could have been a banger
KAYLA: could have been a hit tweet
SARAH: don't call don't call them pepperoni
KAYLA: oh okay people have said that that's like not just him though people
SARAH: I know but in in this context. Also people have referred to them as jipples because they're Jimin’s
KAYLA: that's funny
SARAH: that one I think is funny choco chips
KAYLA: okay you don't have to bring me into this or them
SARAH: what was the other one it was one
KAYLA: that's enough be silent. what did we say?
SARAH: no discourse
KAYLA: be silent. my beef is all of that
SARAH: uh-huh
KAYLA: my juice is that I've been listening to this audiobook and then it got to the part of the book I feel like I talked about this last week or maybe it was in therapy I know I talked about it anyway it got to like the you know the third act conflict or whatever and it was
SARAH: you did talk about this last week
KAYLA: okay so it's making me very sad and I like haven't listened to it in a week but then today I was very brave, and I listened to it and I got through the bad part now there's only an hour left which like considering what's going on right now I don't quite understand how we're gonna resolve this in an hour okay if I'm being honest with you besties so I guess I'll keep you posted next week
SARAH: I don't even know what book this is
KAYLA: it's called the ones we burn
SARAH: oh you did tell us that last week
KAYLA: it's gay it's lesbian witch and princess and
SARAH: winces
KAYLA: and fantasy drama and everyone a lot of death
SARAH: I apologize for saying winces because it sounded like wincest which is winchester incest from supernatural
KAYLA: yeah
SARAH: I'm so sorry
KAYLA: you should be
SARAH: great you can tell us about your beef your juice, your silence on discourse
KAYLA: don't tell us about anything actually just be
SARAH: no
KAYLA: just be silent. Say nothing
SARAH: you can be silent on our social media @soundsfakepod
KAYLA: just at us and then put a couple spaces
SARAH: Some spaces
KAYLA: and we'll know
SARAH: maybe like a sparkle emoji
KAYLA: we'll know
SARAH: yeah
KAYLA: do your best emoji that you think represents silence
(45:00)
SARAH: so true
KAYLA: now I have to think about what that is
SARAH: fish flag
KAYLA: Fish flag for sure
SARAH: just wind. You can tell us about your beef your juice what do you mean I've been signed out you must sign in again to save changes to this file this is what I just fucking ge
KAYLA: I just sent you an emoji that I think is silence.
SARAH: I think that's good. This is what I fucking get for still using my UMich fucking thing because I have to re-log in and re-authenticate with duolingo not duo, duo with two-factor authentication once every week and they're taking away my unlimited storage anyway so like what the fuck anyway I just had to re-log and re-authenticate myself just so I could see the fucking patrons. Kayla is sending me emojis.
KAYLA: I’m just sending you a lot of emojis that I think are silent
SARAH: I see that and I'm choosing to ignore it because I need to do this. our five dollar patrons who we are promoting this week are Sam, Savannah Cozart, Scott Ainslie, and Sofia P I hope you all have a favorite emoji aren't you don't have to it's okay if you don't. our ten dollar patrons who are promoting something this week are Arcnes who would like to promote the Trevor Project, Alyson Maguire who would like to promote Arden Gray by Ray Stoeve, Benjamin Ybarra who would like to promote tabletop games, and David Harris who would like to promote Cradle book series by Will Wight. Also Derick and Carissa, that’s 5 but Derick and Carissa would like to celebrate the seniors who got into college of their choice and support those who are still waiting or didn't, and I would also like to apologize to Derick and Carissa you don't know why I'm apologizing but I did accidentally delete you from my document I think last week or the week before but because you emailed us changing your thing it made me realize that you were gone for some reason
KAYLA: so don't even worry about it actually
SARAH: our other ten dollar patrons are Elle Bitter, my Aunt Jeannie, Maggie Capalbo, Martin Chiesl, Mattie Potater, Purple Hayes, Rosie Costello, Barefoot Backpacker, SongOfStorm, The Steve, and Zirklteo. Changeling and Alex the ace cat have bumped back up to 15 baby oh worm um I have them down for starship changeling.net but then changeling said that I might be doing something different and I did not I did not look any further into that
KAYLA: I don't know that they've told us so that's on them
SARAH: okay Click4Caroline who would like to want ace of hearts, Dia Chappell the ish pal would like to watch twitch.tv/melodydia, Hector Murillo melon via Hector Maria who likes to promote friends and support constructive, and help you grow as a better person John Young who would like to promote merp, Keziah Root who would like to promote the people who come into your life just for a small time around you need them, Maff who would like to promote catching up on the podcast after two years met Nathaniel White who would like to promote NathanielJWhiteDesigns.com, Kayla’s Aunt Nina who would like to promote katemaggartart.com and Sara Jones who's @eternalloli everywhere. Our 20 dollar patrons are Sabrina Hauck of Christmas and Dragonfly who would like to promote being silent thanks for listening tune in next Sunday for more of us new years or don't you know I don't and then
KAYLA: until then
SARAH: a little bit I care a little bit okay
KAYLA: till then take good care of your cows
SARAH: stay tuned
KAYLA: I sent you
SARAH: For some bonus content
KAYLA: oh no
(theme music)
SARAH: hey what's up huh frog there's a frog in there. hmm it is Wednesday my dudes are are the frog is the hold on question for you. it is Wednesday my dudes I don't know that I know that's just like that vine
KAYLA: yeah it's just a vine
SARAH: yes but is that related at all to frogs in the meme world or is that just my dad
KAYLA: I don't think the original vine has anything to do with
SARAH: it doesn't but like has it become associated with frogs because my dad every Wednesday in the family group chat sends a it is Wednesday my dudes message and it is usually frog related and I don't know if that's my dad or no
KAYLA: no because like I used to have frog Fridays with a friend group of mine where every Friday everyone would send a frog picture it is Wednesday my dudes frog oh know your meme okay I mean he does kind of look like a frog in the video you bring a spider man my dudes refers to an exploitable image of a bucket's frog pair with the text it's Wednesday my dudes the image is frequently parodied due to the comedic look of the frog
SARAH: okay so it is frog related
KAYLA: that's not original image originates from a post on tumblr in 2014 really just 2014
SARAH: well today my dad didn't send anything frog related he sent a video of a dog humping a pillow and then it fell off
KAYLA: okay so the the tumblr came first and the vine came second actually so it was always frog and then it was vine and he's imitating the frog scream amazing so your dad was right
SARAH: wow
KAYLA: should we start the podcast?
SARAH: yeah my dad's always about like I don't know at least five weeks behind on memes sometimes up to like four years behind on memes anyway I'll just put this at the end uh bye
(50:32)