Ep 262: Celebrating Pride

(00:00)
SARAH: Hey, what's up? Hello, welcome to Sounds Fake But Okay, a podcast where an aro-ace girl. I'm Sarah, that's me.
KAYLA: And a bi-demisexual girl, that's me, Kayla.
SARAH: Talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else we just don't understand.
KAYLA: On today's episode, celebrating pride.
SARAH AND KAYLA: Sounds fake, but okay.
(theme music)
SARAH: Welcome back to the pod, happy pride!
KAYLA: Happy pride, obey the gay.
SARAH: Oh
KAYLA: I have already started tormenting my straight roommates.
SARAH: Obey the gay.
KAYLA: To ensure that they obey the gay
SARAH: Face the ace.
KAYLA: Face the ace, that's good. Don't deny the bi.
SARAH: Don't deny the bi, lesbian.
KAYLA: Tell the pan you can.
SARAH: Be a fan of the pan. Or fan the pan if they're hot.
KAYLA: Oh, fan the pan, that's good. 
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: I am not pan, but I would like to be fanned right now. It's so fucking hot. We have entered the season of the podcast where Kayla is miserable the entire time because she does not have air conditioning. And she must turn off her window –
SARAH: Well, you have a window unit, but you can't run it while we're doing the pod.
KAYLA: I probably shouldn't. Maybe we can run a test next week or sometime I'll record a little sound byte for you with it running and we'll see if you can edit it out. Perhaps we'll do that sometime.
SARAH: We'll see.
KAYLA: Sarah said I don't actually want to do any of that extra work. You can rot in the spicy hell that you're in.
SARAH: Look, LA was only 70 degrees today.
KAYLA: Must be fucking nice. You know what? I'm going to run my fan all the time while you're talking. Cut that out.
SARAH: I’m actually…
KAYLA: Get a load of this. Get a load of this right in the mic.
SARAH: I apologize partly for what I've done. Anyway, do we have any housekeeping? Our literati event, our book event in the Lord’s Michigan in Ann Arbor is Friday, June 30th, the last day of Pride Month. 
KAYLA: True
SARAH: So roll up. There are no tickets or wait, like you don't reserve anything.
KAYLA: Just show up.
SARAH: Just show up and given the size of my family combined with the size of Kayla's family, we would suggest getting there early because there is an occupancy limit.
KAYLA: I do think the occupancy limit is 60
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: which I'm not too worried about. However, both of our entire families are coming.
SARAH: Yeah, but if my entire family came, which my entire family is not going to come, but if they did, that would be a good 30 people.
KAYLA: That's several. So this should just be more reason to come. You get to meet everyone. Step Dean will not be there. So you could only have seen him if you were in New York. But what you going to do?
SARAH: Do we have any other housekeeping?
KAYLA: Buy the book.
SARAH: Do it for Pride.
KAYLA: Do it for Pride. 15% off on JKP's website all month. 
SARAH: Yes indeed all month
KAYLA: All other, all the queer books. I think all the queer books.
SARAH: All the queer titles, at least the ones that were in the Instagram they posted.
KAYLA: At least that. 15% off at JKP this month. So if you haven't gotten it yet, go get it. Do it for cheaper.
SARAH: (whispering) For cheaper. Are we ever going to get paid for our book? Have we reached the threshold?
KAYLA: (laughing) I don't fucking know. I have to assume we have given just the mere, the amount of reprints I've heard about, but they don't talk to me anymore.
SARAH: I can't wait to just one day –
KAYLA: receive a mystery check.
SARAH: Receive a mystery check
KAYLA: Me too. I hope they send it to the right fucking address. Actually, I should probably check it.
SARAH: My address hasn't changed, so if I get one and you don't.
KAYLA: That's true. Then we'll know.
SARAH: Anyway, this is not, this is not your housekeeping. This is me and Kayla's personal housekeeping. 
KAYLA: Let's just bleep all of that out.
SARAH: No, I don't feel like it. Kayla, what are we talking about this week?
KAYLA: This week, as it is the first week of Pride, for us it is the first day of Pride.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: We're going to be talking about it, talking about ways to celebrate it, giving you some ideas.
SARAH: Yeah. We've talked in the past about ways to kind of treat yourself during Pride month and how to do self-care during Pride month. Is this similar to that? Don't worry about it.
KAYLA: I honestly don't remember doing that because I was looking up, I Control+F'd Pride on our episode list.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: I found us talking about 
(05:00)
KAYLA: the first Pride event, Pride parades we had gone to. I found us reacting to Taylor Swift's, the one very gay video she did.
SARAH: What?
KAYLA: Which, remember the very gay video she did? I forget which song it was, but it had all the Queer Eye guys in it. And. Do you remember this?
SARAH: (laughing) No.
KAYLA: Let me look up which song it is, and we talked about it. Glad we didn't put that out these days, or the Swifties probably would have come for us hard.
SARAH: Yeah, we're not going to dip our toe into the current Taylor drama.
KAYLA: No, no, Taylor Swift's music video.
SARAH: Not good for us
KAYLA: You need to calm down. Remember?
SARAH: Oh, right, okay.
KAYLA: It had every gay in it?
SARAH: Every gay, yeah, okay, alright, sure.
KAYLA: Anyway, so we talked about that, some other Pride stuff, anyway.
SARAH: I don't know, maybe I'm gaslighting myself, maybe I'm gaslighting all of you, maybe Kayla's gaslighting us, who knows?
KAYLA: Not.
SARAH: But yeah, so we're going to talk about Pride, and we're going to talk about ways you can celebrate Pride that aren't just like going to a parade, you know?
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: Alright, shall we begin? It's not a disclaimer, but it's the preface about Pride.
KAYLA: Yeah, I mean, Pride this year is just, I think, the most difficult it's been in a while.
SARAH: Mhm. At least in the US.
KAYLA: At least, well, yeah, definitely, yeah, in other countries, obviously, this has been like the day to day for years. But at least I feel like in my memory and in my time of like celebrating Pride, this definitely feels the most contentious.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: Just today, I saw like some different companies like Pride posts on Instagram, and I did a little peek in the comments.
SARAH: Oof
KAYLA: And like, to be fair, I didn't look in the comments last year
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: so I can't really say if it's worse or if people were always being assholes, but like, tough stuff.
SARAH: Yeah, like, it's easy to kind of be in your little bubble of like queer friendliness.
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: And then as soon as you like step outside of that bubble, you're like, what the fuck, dawg? People think this shit?
KAYLA: It's intense. And it's also like, obviously, like, I know where all of this is coming from, but it's so confusing, because I feel like for the past, like, decade, companies have gotten very used to just like doing the rainbow profile picture and like making a little statement about how they love the gays.
SARAH: Performative Pride.
KAYLA: Performative Pride, and like no one really thinks, no one on either side, I feel like, thinks that much of it. And then it's like, whatever. This year – 
SARAH: Yeah, like, people on the left are like, it's kind of performative, like, we appreciate it, but it's performative. And then people on the right are like, it's stupid. Or maybe they boycott the company for two days.
KAYLA: Right. But I feel like this year, especially, it's been like, just...
SARAH: There's been so many attacks on trans youth and trans adults. 
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: And I think that has definitely got the queer community up in arms, because it is, our existence is being threatened. The existence of trans people is being threatened, and people also have reason to believe that it's not going to stop at trans people. So it's a little rough one. But you know what? We're still going to celebrate Pride.
KAYLA: Yes, we're going to celebrate and we're going to fight because Pride originated as a riot.
SARAH: Absolutely. Sometimes a bitch got to throw a brick.
KAYLA: Sometimes a bitch got to throw a brick.
SARAH: So yeah, I feel like the big thing that when it's Pride season, you know, the big thing that everyone is like, oh, you got to go to a Pride parade, you know, it's a whole thing, but big Pride parades and events like that don't always feel welcoming to aspec folks, and we're definitely trying and hoping to change that. But if you don't feel comfortable or safe going to a big Pride parade for any reason, would you like me to list some reasons that are completely valid?
KAYLA: I would, but also another serious point to make
SARAH: Yes?
KAYLA: before we descend into silliness. And I haven't seen it. We're only one day into Pride, so I can't wait to see on which day of Pride Jesus will come again and the can't get Pride debate will rise once again
SARAH: Oh Jesus Christ
KAYLA: the unholy beast, which also then, of course, turns into like sexualization of Pride. And then the ace people get brought in and then we know it. We've seen it every year.
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: But within that cobweb of fucking bullshit is –
(10:00)
SARAH: I bet it's going to be worse this year.
KAYLA: I'm sure it is. 
SARAH: Because it's going to bring in the anti-trans rhetoric of like, you're grooming children
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: and then the people who think trans people don't belong in the community are going to be assholes.
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: Anyway, continue.
KAYLA: Bleak. Don't worry, we'll get around soon. Within all of that bullshit is the like valid point that queer spaces and Pride spaces are often very sexualized. And obviously for some aspec people, that's totally fine. And for other aspecs, it's not. And for some allo people, that's not the best. And obviously there's like a long history about like why that's the case and how queer spaces became so sexualized. But I think that's why it's important, like I guess we're doing silly ideas, but in all seriousness to like talk about alternative ways to celebrate Pride.
SARAH: I think some of them are perfectly serious.
KAYLA: I'm sure they will be. But to like to celebrate Pride in ways that is unsexualized, is non-alcoholic because there's a lot of like sober people and a lot of times like it's bars and alcohol that's heavily intertwined. So
SARAH: Yeah
KAYLA: yes, that's and that's it
SARAH: Valid and good. Speaking of valid and good and also over-sexualized spaces sometimes–
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: I am going to list a list of completely valid reasons why a person would not want to attend a big Pride parade or event.
KAYLA: Okay
SARAH: First of which being they don't like how sexualized it is. Maybe they're sex repulsed. Maybe they're just not comfortable with that. Maybe you are worried that there are aspec exclusionists or you know that the people who organized it are aspec exclusionists. Maybe there's just not one near you.
KAYLA: Fair
SARAH: Like if you live in a rural area and like the nearest Pride parade is like two and a half hours away like that.
KAYLA: That’s a lot
SARAH: That would be a whole day thing if you don't feel safe going due to unsupportive people around you and/or your living situation. You worry about violence in general. That's an especially American one. But, you know, Kayla is really trying hard for her fan sound to not get picked up by the mic.
KAYLA: I'm leaning far away from the mic in hopes that… I could just like turn my chair.
SARAH: You could.
KAYLA: I'm listening.
SARAH: She's facing away from me now. I have more. Do you have something to say?
KAYLA: Well, I was just going to I was going to yes and that. I'm not a big crowds guy.
SARAH: That's on the list. Let me finish my list.
KAYLA: I'll go back to fanning myself.
SARAH: That was literally the next thing on the list, which was.
KAYLA: I'll be over here with my fan. Thank you.
SARAH: Okay. What is it? You don't like being around that many people and noise and overstimulation. And it can be a lot. Another reason you just don't like parades. They're a little weird. A little weird as a concept.
KAYLA: They really are. What is the history of parades?
SARAH: I'm going to. You look that up. Another valid reason you don't feel like it. You don't feel like it. 
KAYLA: Me.
SARAH: You don't – Maybe maybe your mental illness is mental illnessing. Or maybe you just don't fucking want to.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Maybe you have no one to go with and you don't want to go alone.
KAYLA: Going alone is scary and hard.
SARAH: Maybe.
KAYLA: I will say, oh, you're not done yet.
SARAH: I have it's one more.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: I have one more, which is that maybe you're a vampire and you can't go outside.
KAYLA: Oh, that's a good one.
SARAH: Wear sunscreen, guys.
KAYLA: Yeah, wear sunscreen. I was just going to say that I am not a big crowds guy. Get very overstimulated, a little overstimmy. So I honestly don't know if I'm going to go to like the Boston parade. I think that there hasn't been a Boston Pride parade in a long time, but allegedly it's coming back this year.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: But Boston parades get like…
SARAH: rowdy
KAYLA: Pretty intense. Yeah. Like the St. Patrick's Day parade, I got nowhere near because it's just like.
SARAH: Do they burn couches like they do in East Lansing?
KAYLA: I don't think they burn couches, but it's like what I understand it's similar to if you were to go to Times Square for New Year's Eve, where like you kind of have to get there really early and then you're stuck.
SARAH: Yeah. 
KAYLA: And then it's like, what are you doing? You're just like watching a bunch of drunk people walk around. Like I don't, I don't personally see a lot of the benefit.
SARAH: I can understand why parades were interesting before the advent of television.
KAYLA: So here's what I found on my Google search. This is from FarmersAlmanac.com.
SARAH: Oh my god, Farmers Almanac. Thank you.
KAYLA: Did you ever have a Farmers Almanac book in your home?
SARAH: Maybe. 
KAYLA: We did. In the John. In the potty. 
(15:00)
KAYLA: Anyway
SARAH: your, your dad ate it?
KAYLA: Yeah, it's in my father John. (singing) His name was my name too. Anyway, ancient cities often had special elaborately constructed streets whose main function was to provide a place for processions. So streets just for parades. 
SARAH: I mean for royalty
KAYLA: like the earliest reference to a parade is found in cave paintings. So I guess humans really just like to be in a line. I think they just experts speculate that earliest events consisted of prehistoric men triumphantly carrying the game they killed back during a hunt to their camp.
SARAH: Yeah, I think they just feel less relevant in the modern media age because we have so much media and so much to do all the time. But if you think about
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: the olden days and not even like the olden like not even that long ago, like like 70 years ago.
KAYLA: 50 years. Yeah
SARAH: like even when they would just go. It was something to do.
KAYLA: To the harbor to wave at shit.
SARAH: It was something to do. That was a thing that they did.
SARAH: You could you brought the community together to celebrate things. I don't know. Anyway, all of the reasons we listed are valid reasons. And so if you can't or won't attend a big pride event for any reason or if you just want to do more, maybe you want to go to pride and also do something else. I'm not sure if I'm going to go to pride this year. I think I'm going to ask my friends if they're planning on going. And if they're going, I might go. But if they're not, I'm not going to jump through hoops. You know
KAYLA: Fair.
SARAH: Anyway, here are some ideas for ways you can celebrate pride that aren't just going to parades. And again, if you think this is similar to episodes we've done before. No, it's not. It's completely new and inventive. And you know what? It is relevant every year. So take that.
KAYLA: Also, it's been seven years, you guys. It's been almost seven years. We can't. There's only so much to discuss.
SARAH: I only have so many brain cells. Alright
KAYLA: Exactly.
SARAH: First thing, get a meal with queer friends and or outspoken allies. No half-assed allies. We don't want half-assed allies here. We want the best of allies. The kinds of allies where you wonder, are you actually queer?
KAYLA: Me from the past.
SARAH: You could get a meal with those people. Or if you don't want to spend any money, you could go to the park because that costs no money, probably, hopefully. Or you could loiter queerly and non-threateningly outside your local superstore. If you live in a place that doesn't have superstores, a.k.a. like not the US or Canada. Well, I think the UK has them.
KAYLA: Why do you have to loiter outside, though?
SARAH: We're getting there.
KAYLA: Okay
SARAH: You can just go to some sort of local market, grocery store, whatever seems right to you. You can loiter queerly and non-threateningly outside. Or you can go into your local superstore, market, whatever it is, and point at all of the inanimate objects you think are gay.
KAYLA: This is very good to me, especially as someone who came from a very small town with nothing to do where one of the only things to do was walk around the local superstore.
SARAH: Walk around Meyer
KAYLA: Yeah
SARAH: Which we couldn't call Meyer in the book because people don't know what Meyer is.
KAYLA: The important people do. They know.
SARAH: But you can just be together. That's fun. Just hang out with your queer friends. That is a way to celebrate Pride, is being with other queer people. Another way to celebrate Pride is by making a cake. This is especially relevant to aspec people. You could buy a cake. You don't even have to make a cake. You can buy a cake, a cupcake, any dessert product, really. And when in doubt, if you're in like, I don't know, if you're worried that people are, if you're in an unsafe situation, and they're going to be like, what's this cake for? Don't worry. You can claim it's for the summer solstice. Unless you're from a very religious background, and that would also be seen as a bad thing. In which case, it's for Jesus?
KAYLA: Wasn't Jesus technically born in the summer? Isn’t that what they say?
SARAH: Maybe the spring, yeah. Based on the fruits they mentioned.
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: If Jesus is not a major figure in your religion, in that case, you can just insert major religious figure or June-based celebration instead.
KAYLA: Oh boy
SARAH:  Or just someone's birthday. It doesn't even have to be someone you know. It can just be like a fictional character you like.
(20:00)
SARAH: Kayla's simply gone. Oh, she's back. Hi.
KAYLA: Zoom simply disconnected.
SARAH: Cool.
KAYLA: My computer is like, frying an egg right now. 
SARAH: Let me…
(bleep)
KAYLA: I've turned the air on. I'm going to fan my computer a little bit.
SARAH: Fan the pan.
KAYLA: Okay. We'll try this. And if it's really bad next week, we will… Or if it's really bad in the edit, then we will reconvene next week.
SARAH: Okay.
KAYLA: On what to do. 
SARAH: Make a cake. What were you going to say?
KAYLA:  Oh, I was going to say that gentle giant a… Gentle giant… What is his at?
SARAH: Marshall.
KAYLA: Yes, gentle giant ace. Marshall. It's usually around ace week, but I feel like it's also around Pride. His mom always makes an ace cake.
SARAH: So sweet.
KAYLA: I'm very excited to see what is to come this year for that.
SARAH: You can use food coloring, although it's hard to get black with food coloring without it being weird tasting.
KAYLA: It just dyes your teeth.
SARAH: Yeah, and if you use enough food coloring to actually get it black, you start tasting the food coloring.
KAYLA: Yeah. Y'all, I'll say it. Sometimes the ace flag sucks.
SARAH: I have really been digging recently the aro ace flag, and I know it's less recognizable, KAYLA: But it’s good
SARAH: but I just think it's a better flag. I think on their own, the ace and aro flags are fine, but I don't love the color combos together.
KAYLA: Yeah. As we have seen from our changing logos over the year, difficult colors to work together.
SARAH: Yes, difficult colors to work together. And I like the aro ace flag. I think it looks like a sunset over the water.
KAYLA: I remember that one time where we saw the post where someone was like, the purple in the bi flag and the ace flag should switch because of the saturations.
SARAH: Mm. Switcheroo
KAYLA: They were right.
SARAH: Well, you've got them both, so you can just copy paste.
KAYLA: Okay. 
SARAH: Get some scissors. Let's go.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Another thing you can do to celebrate pride is, if you can, and if it is within your means, you can donate to queer causes. 
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: There are a lot of great charities, but also mutual aid networks are so important in so many communities. And many of them are paid person to person via Venmo or Cash App or other means in that realm. So if you're concerned about someone tracking your money, that might be a safer way to do it. And I've even provided you with some great excuses for what it was instead. 
KAYLA: Oh
SARAH: you paid a street vendor, if that's something you have in your area. Got a lot of those here. You donated to a student organization or a sports team. I should have listed a third thing.
KAYLA: You bought a present. You went in. Oh, here's something I've done. You went in on a group gift for someone.
SARAH: Yes. Very good.
KAYLA: So you had to Venmo a large amount of money or a small amount of money to go in on said group gift.
SARAH: Or straight up, if you have a friend who feels comfortable doing it, you can Venmo them and have them do it on your behalf.
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: You just got food together and you were paying them back. It was gas money. If that's something you care about.
KAYLA: It was Chipotle.
SARAH: It was chipotle. A big exciting thing happened for them and to celebrate, you told them to buy a little treat on you.
KAYLA: Mhm
SARAH: All great reasons.
KAYLA: Perfect
SARAH: Also, there are a lot of lovely queer charities that overlap with religious charities, especially for communities, religious groups where queer people are not in the best situation. I once donated to Queer Crescent, which is a Muslim queer organization.
KAYLA: Wow
SARAH: They currently actually have a specific fund that's called the Muslim Fund for Bodily Autonomy. They're moving resources to trans, non-binary and queer Muslims and their families. Look at that.
KAYLA: I love that.
SARAH: That's something they're doing right now. So that's a good place. There are other ones, I'm sure. That's just the one that I personally know about. Also, things like abortion access and immigration access are queer issues
KAYLA: True 
SARAH: and a lot of things intersect with queer issues. So that might be something to consider as well because queer people need abortions and queer people who are not safe in their home country
(25:00)
SARAH:  need to come to a country that is perhaps a little kinder to them, not that kind in the case of the U.S., but a little kinder, maybe a little safer.
KAYLA: (laughing) Not too kind now
SARAH: Maybe a little safer. And so those are all intersecting issues and supporting organizations that do good work in those areas is also supporting queer people. So take that.
KAYLA: Just go to Canada. That's what I –
SARAH: Yeah. Canada has their own issues, but they are – I saw a TikTok the other day. It was yesterday that- you know the Nations of the World song?
KAYLA: Vaguely?
SARAH: Like the – (singing) Mexico, Canada, Jamaica, Peru.
KAYLA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SARAH: So what this person does is she plays the song and then each video is like countries that XYZ and then she only shows up on screen for those countries.
KAYLA: That's fun.
SARAH: And she did one for ahead of Pride Month that was like countries that have a 90 or higher on like the LGBTQ+ whatever index. And it was Canada, Greenland, and Iceland, I think? And that was it.
KAYLA: Yeah, that sounds right.
SARAH: Yeah. So, woof. Anyway, what was happening? Where am I? Bogey, please stop yelling.
KAYLA: (laughing) I don’t fucking know. What a day we're having.
SARAH: Hold on, let me go get him.
KAYLA: Good.
SARAH: Speak into the mic, Bogey. Do you have something to say? Kayla, I can't hear you.
KAYLA: Oh, there's the boy. Criminal.
SARAH: I actually can hear you.
KAYLA: Criminal.
SARAH: Do you have something to say? You had caught, you had caught lamb chop. I’m very proud of you
KAYLA: Ah, yes. We often have that problem. 
SARAH: I'm sorry.
KAYLA: I don't know if she can hear me. We often have the problem in this household where Billie will catch the rainbow poop emoji toy and just has to let me know about it in the middle of the night.
SARAH: Oh, yeah. Bogey has a special lamb chop scream. He only meows this certain way when he has quote unquote caught lamb chop and needs you to congratulate him. And the only way to stop him from screaming is to go to wherever he is and congratulate him.
KAYLA: Cats are something else.
SARAH: Our little Bogey, I always just pick up lamb chop and I'm like, good job. And then I put lamb chop on his head.
KAYLA: Good.
SARAH: He's like (noises) anyway, where were we? The next thing that you can do to celebrate pride is wear a silly hat.
KAYLA: And you know where you could buy a silly hat?
SARAH: (gasps) Tell me.
KAYLA: Our store.
SARAH: Oh, my God.
KAYLA: Soundsfake.com slash. Shop.
SARAH: Shop?
KAYLA: I think. I'm actually not sure.
SARAH: It's not store. It's shop.
KAYLA: Okay. I believe you.
SARAH: I am 99% sure. But now I'm going to check.
KAYLA: See, I always think I'm sure too. And then I'll be wrong.
SARAH: Soundsfake.com/shop.
KAYLA: Who can get there first? 
SARAH: Yes, it's shop. Did it. 
KAYLA: Alright. So anyway, you can get a hat there or lots of other places. I saw today that Watcher, home of Ryan and Shane, released their pride collection.
SARAH: Excuse you. This is Erasure of… What's his name?
KAYLA: Steven?
SARAH: Steven.
KAYLA: Okay, who’s erasing now?
SARAH: Yeah. This is Steven Erasure.
KAYLA: And Steven. They released their pride collection of merch. I think all the proceeds are going to a trans organization. I can't remember which one. But there's their logo, the question marks, like mystery files logo, but just like in the ace flag, which is very good because then it's just like, huh?
SARAH: (laughing) Huh?
KAYLA: I think it's very good. Very good.
SARAH: Very nice.
KAYLA: That's some other merch you could buy, I guess.
SARAH: Another somewhat related thing that you can do is ace ring, aro ring. Wear literally anything that you decide to give queer meaning.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: It could be that silly hat. 
KAYLA: Silly hats are quite queer.
SARAH:  It could be like, this is my gay little hat.
KAYLA: Most hats are little and gay, in my opinion.
(30:00)
SARAH: Except when they're big and gay.
KAYLA: Yeah, exactly. But then they're still kind of little and gay. You know what I mean?
SARAH: Yeah. Everything's little, if you just believe. Another thing you can do is watch or read queer media.
KAYLA: True.
SARAH: You can support… I lost my spot. You can support shows and films and books and comics with positive and real queer representation, not just like lip service. You can give them your clicks and your streams to prove to the powers that be that our stories are in demand. And yes, fan fiction does count for this.
KAYLA: Yes. Yes, yes, yes.
SARAH: In this house, we respect fan fiction. The last one that I have written down ahead of time is really to do with those last several things, which is patronize, as in be a patron of, not make fun of, patronize a queer-owned business.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: You don't necessarily have to buy anything Pride or queer-related, but you can just support a small queer business owner. You can find businesses on TikTok or Instagram, or you can literally just Google queer-owned businesses near me and see what you come up with, or not near you. The world is profoundly interconnected. Shipping gets cheaper by the day, and a lot of businesses are doing Pride month sales and promotions. So...
KAYLA: This is true. I think there was also… Is it on Google Maps? I feel like there's one of the map services recently that says queer-owned maybe? 
SARAH: I think it was Google Maps because I Googled this earlier and then I think I saw something.
KAYLA: I know the yoga studio I go to is queer and black-owned, so that's very exciting. There’s a gay gym very close by.
SARAH: When I looked that up today, I found a queer gym. I don't think it's actually that close to me, but that's so cool.
KAYLA: Yes.
SARAH: So just Google around.
KAYLA: There's probably way more than you think, because I feel like often they're not advertising it that heavily unless it's during Pride month.
SARAH: Right.
KAYLA: So be on the lookout.
KAYLA: Exactly.
SARAH: Sorry. I want to now see if this gym is near me. And you know what you can do? You can find a queer-owned bookstore and go to that bookstore and you can buy other queer books.
KAYLA: I was going to say that as well.
SARAH: You can buy all sorts of fun stuff.
KAYLA: You know what I learned recently? In some stores, our book is in the psychology and self-help section.
SARAH: Interesting.
KAYLA: Don't know about all that, but if you can't find it where you think you should, maybe go there.
SARAH: Alright. Cool. Let's see. This gym in the LA area is called Everybody.
KAYLA: I love that.
SARAH: It is in South Glendale. Is that even still Glendale? Cypress Park. But Cypress Park is not helpful to me.
KAYLA: I love when people in LA talk about places. It's so funny.
SARAH: It's east of Silver Lake on the other side of the Five, if that's helpful to you.
KAYLA: I'm going to leave my yoga studio a five star review.
SARAH: I hope you do.
KAYLA: Y'all, this is another thing you can do.
SARAH: (laughing) Leave good reviews.
KAYLA: Yes, I'm being serious.
SARAH: No, you're correct.
KAYLA: Kinds of queer media and stuff, because I'll tell you, sometimes we get reviews on this podcast and on our book that are just from aphobes.
SARAH: Yeah. I'm now just looking at the Queer on Businesses near me on Yelp, and there's such a variety. There's one called It's Not Trash. It's a furniture store.
KAYLA: I love that. Very much.
SARAH: Furniture stores and commissioned artists. That's great. And it's not trash. Got some bars and clubs. We got a gym. We got a haircut place. We got some spas. We got arcade, comic book shops and restaurants. Another barbie shop. Barbie shop? Another barbershop. A cleaning company? I saw a TikTok the other day of Phoebe Bridges' sister.
KAYLA: She has a sister?
SARAH: Yeah. Well, I think she's her sister.
KAYLA: Who’s to say?
SARAH; They look exactly the same, and they have the same last name.
KAYLA: Well, that would do it, wouldn't it?
SARAH: But she was like, come with me as I go get my haircut by the girl I went on a first date with yesterday.
KAYLA: Mm. It’s giving gay. You know what's giving gay? You know what you could do this pride month? Start dating someone really quickly.
(35:00)
KAYLA: This girl I follow on TikTok. Her name is Brynn, I think. She's a makeup influencer. But she got a brand deal to go to Coachella, and none of her friends could go with her. So she had this girl that she'd met at a club that she'd been talking to for two weeks, and she was like, hey, want to do our first date at the whole weekend of Coachella? And so they did the whole weekend of Coachella. And then everyone thought that they were official because spending a whole week at Coachella.
SARAH: Yeah it is coachella
KAYLA: And they were like, well, might as well be girlfriends now. And so now they're just girlfriends.
SARAH: Oh my god. I found a queer-owned business that it's for adult ADD and ADHD treatment.
KAYLA: When are you going?
SARAH: It's in Beverly Hills. That's so far away.
KAYLA: Sounds worth it to me.
SARAH: Well, the services we provide. What do you do? Cognitive behavioral therapy.
KAYLA: Should I become a local guide on Google Maps? Earn points? Should I become a Google Maps influencer? Is this my life? It's not.
SARAH: Anyway.
KAYLA: It is not my life.
SARAH: Okay, we're going to close this tab because I could keep doing that for a long time.
KAYLA: Okay
SARAH: Anyway, do you have anything to add, things that you can do to celebrate Pride that are not going to a parade or big event or getting drunk? Drag brunch.
KAYLA: Drag brunch.
SARAH: Drag, drag, library reading event.
KAYLA: I think you can, if it's safe and possible for you to do so, you could try to set up some Pride programming at your school or place of business.
SARAH: Yes. Did you hear about that high school where they wanted to do the gender bent something?
KAYLA: No, I had not.
SARAH: Play. And then some parents were like, no. And so the administration was like, yeah, Okay, fine, we won't do it. And so then the kids were like, fuck you. And they raised like $18,000.
KAYLA: Holy shit.
SARAH: And they put it on at a different venue that was way bigger and like opening night was sold out. And there were like 1,500 people there.
KAYLA: That is slay.
SARAH: It is slay.
KAYLA: You can share, you know, share information with allies, with the world, educating if you are able to do so.
SARAH: Just like especially if you live in a place where trans rights are being threatened, just like showing your support to our trans siblings, whether that's showing up to something or just being like, hey, I love you. You're cool. Same thing for drag performers, some of which are trans, some of which are not. You know, just show just show support for them because they have a place in this community and this world, even if Ron DeSantis is a piece of steaming doo doo.
KAYLA: Yes. Also, if you could get involved politically, if you can like contact your congressperson
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: or make your opinions known on all of this shitty laws that are being passed, that is a great thing to do during Pride.
SARAH: Yep. Sometimes I forget about that because I live in California.
KAYLA: Yeah. 
SARAH: And so like it's not necessarily my representatives, at least not on the national level, who are doing this shit. But yeah. Also, what I have done before is if my old Michigan reps have been problematic, I have reached out to them and just put in my parents' address.
KAYLA: Yeah, sometimes.
SARAH: Because oftentimes they will ask you for your address because they, you know, they take feedback more seriously from constituents or they only take feedback from constituents. And so, you know, got things to say.
KAYLA: You know.
SARAH: You know. So yeah, Pride can be a tough month, but it can also be a fun month and a very celebratory month. And just fucking ignore all of the discourse, please.
KAYLA: Yeah. Keep your head up. I feel like it's, you know, it's set to perhaps be a rough one.
SARAH: Mhm
KAYLA: But celebrate when you can. Take care of yourself. And just do your best.
SARAH: Wear a silly hat.
KAYLA: Wear a silly hat. We're very proud of you. You're doing a great job. 
SARAH: You're doing great. 
KAYLA: And we're all doing the best we can.
SARAH: If this is your first Pride, I hope you have a very good experience. I mean, I hope you all have a good experience. But like, especially, especially if it's your first Pride being out or being questioning or anything
(40:00)
KAYLA: Yes
SARAH: you belong here and you're doing a good job. And I think you're cool.
KAYLA: Yeah, you're pretty cool.
SARAH: And also probably hot.
KAYLA: Probably definitely hot. Ugly people don't listen to this.
SARAH: Yeah. I thought you were going to say something like ugly people are only straight.
KAYLA: That's also true. Well, I'm dating a straight. Can't say that.
SARAH: I didn't say all straight people are ugly.
KAYLA; I jumped to that myself.
SARAH: You jumped to hashtag all lives matter from that. 
KAYLA: All straights are ugly. 
SARAH: Hashtag all straights matter.
KAYLA: That's my B. Sorry, everyone.
SARAH: (laughing) Hashtag not all straights.
KAYLA: Okay.
SARAH: Anyway. Oh, great. What's our poll for this week? How are you going to celebrate Pride?
KAYLA: How are you celebrating Pride?
SARAH: Tell us.
KAYLA: Tell me.
SARAH: Okay, fine. Just tell Kayla. Don’t tell me.
KAYLA: Yeah. Tell me. 
SARAH: Yeah, please tell us. Kayla, what's your beef and your juice for this week?
KAYLA: My beef is that this week I had, I'm still getting over it, but I have a very nasty cold.
SARAH: Nasty.
KAYLA: It made me feel like I was dying. And my friend was visiting and I didn't get to spend as much time with her because I was ill. And then today I woke up and I felt literally high because I just had such a brain fog. My roommate, it was Jared. You've heard of him.
SARAH: You’ve heard of him
KAYLA: I came downstairs and he looked at me and was like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Because I was just so out of it.
SARAH: (laughing) Oh no.
KAYLA: And I had very important stuff to do today. So it was really just not a day for me. Anyway.
SARAH: Important stuff today.
KAYLA: Yeah. That's my beef. My juice is that now my cold is going away.
SARAH: That's good.
KAYLA: And also I've gotten really into green tea lemonade recently. I'm a green tea girlie now
SARAH: Okay
KAYLA: and I think that's fun.
SARAH: Alright. I have a piece of, it's neither beef nor juice. It's like lukewarm tofu.
KAYLA: Where did that cat come from? She just popped out of nowhere.
SARAH: Oh, okay.
KAYLA: Didn't know she was in here.
SARAH: There's a cat on the back of my seat now. My lukewarm tofu. I don't even like tofu. I did try it once.
KAYLA: It's gravy. It's gravy if it's in the middle.
SARAH: Okay. My lukewarm gravy. It's not like in the middle. It's just like neither negative nor positive, which is that my boss's wife just requested to add me on LinkedIn.
KAYLA: Well, that's something.  Yeah. We need a category for just, well, that's something.
SARAH: Well, that's something.
KAYLA: Can someone suggest?
SARAH: Sure. I'll accept. It's fine.
KAYLA: Someone please suggest what that should be. I like this new category.
SARAH: Lukewarm tofu.
KAYLA: No, no. I don't like that.
SARAH: I don't either.
KAYLA: Someone else come up with something better.
SARAH: Okay. My beef is incompetent people who cosplay as competent.
KAYLA: Ugh
SARAH: And then once you work with them for like a day, you realize they're useless, but they continue to cosplay as competent. And they make other people think they're competent. And then you have to be like...
KAYLA: I know so many people like this. It's painful.
SARAH: My juice is that last weekend I saw TXT twice and I survived.
KAYLA: And you looked really sexy.
SARAH: I sure did.
KAYLA: Respectfully.
SARAH: Respectfully. My other juice is that after we finish recording this podcast, I'm going to go across the street to the gas station and buy cinnamon toast crunch.
KAYLA: Yeah.
SARAH: Yeah. You can tell us about your beef, your juice, your pride month plans on our social media @SoundsFakePod. We also have a Patreon, patreon.com/SoundsFakePod. Listen, aspecs can't owe money. But if aspecs were to give their money freely
KAYLA: You should do it
SARAH: pride month is a great month to start.
KAYLA: True. That’s it.
SARAH: So thank you to all of our lovely, lovely patrons who make it possible for us to have transcriptions of our podcasts so that it is more accessible to the people of the worldwide web. Our $5 patrons who we're promoting this week are Leila, Livvy, Mary S. Mattie, and Mel McMeans. I'm sad because Leila was last week, so we didn't get to do a Leila, Lily, Livvy, but I just said it anyway. Leila, you get a double dip.
KAYLA: Congratulations. Happy Pride.
SARAH: Our $10 patrons who are promoting something this week are David Harris, who would like to promote the Cradle Book series by Will Wight, Derick and Carissa, who would like to celebrate the seniors who got into the college of their choice and support those who are still waiting or didn't.
(45:00)
SARAH: Elle Bitter, who would like to promote normalizing the use of tone indicators /srs. And my Aunt Jeannie, who would like to promote Christopher's Haven. Also Koolin, who would like to promote Evan Gia. She makes pretty bangers. And I would not be surprised if she was queer. I have no idea, but I don't know.
KAYLA: Who's to say?
SARAH: Hold on. Now I gotta Google it.
KAYLA: Now we gotta.
SARAH: Evan Giia. She is a Brooklyn based vocalist. Why is she called a vocalist? Interesting. They call her a vocalist and not a singer. Yeah, the Wikipedia is not helpful. Let me go to your Instagram and catch your vibes. Definitely could be queer.
KAYLA: Good.
SARAH: Let's look at your story. Do you have anything for pride? It's the first day. I don't know. I can't tell. Very possibly, but not 100% positive. Earlier today, my sister sent me an Instagram of someone that I don't know and I've never met. And she was like, do you think this person is and then it was the nails emoji?
KAYLA: (laughing) Good
SARAH: We had a whole discussion about it. Anyway. What? 
KAYLA: I don’t know.
SARAH: Okay. Our other ten dollar patrons are Maggie Capalbo, Martin Chiesl, Mattie, Potater, Purple Hayes, Barefoot Backpacker, Ruby, Song of Storm, The Steve, Zirklteo, Arcnes, Alyson, Ben MacLeod, who I did pronounce their name correctly. So.
KAYLA: Hell yeah.
SARAH: Benjamin Ybarra, Boston Smith. And that's it. Our fifteen dollar patrons are Andrew Hillum, who would like to promote the Invisible Spectrum podcast, Changeling and Alex the ace Cat, who would like to promote Starship changeling.net, but queerer than usual. Even more so. Click4Caroline, who would like to promote Ace of Hearts, Dia Chappelle, who would like to promote Twitch.tv slash Melody Dia, Hector Murillo, who would like to promote friends that are supportive, constructive, and help you grow as a better person, especially in this Pride month. John Young. Pause. Maff, who would like to promote Catching Up on the Podcast after two-year Nathaniel White, who would like to promote NathanielJwhitedesigns.com, Kayla’s aunt Nina, who would like to promote KateMaggartArt.com, and Sara Jones, who was @eternalloli everywhere. Our twenty dollar patrons are Sabrina Hauck, Merry Pride, and Dragonfly, who would like to promote marrying the concept of pride. Thanks for listening. Tune in next Sunday for more advice on your ears.
KAYLA: Until then, take good care of your cows.
(47:15)